Tottie's diary: 1888

Sepia-toned photograph of dark-haired woman with light-coloured coat over dark top.
Jessie Macgregor, around 1887 / Atkinson & Co. [c1887]. Sydney Living Museums, June Wallace papers, Rec. no 43037
1888 entries.

1 January 1888 
This is my first attempt at keeping a diary, I wonder how long it will last, Jess & I have started together We are waiting to see the New Year in & wondering what it will bring for us. Tom Stafford & Mr Hunt are also waiting for the New Year Georgie Bruce Mary Stafford Grandfather & Uncle Kenny are in bed I wonder where we will, all be this night next year I also wonder if we will be all spared to each other. We have had many blessings through the past year only one has gone from us to a better country (dear little Teecie) many might have been taken. Will Jessie & I be in the same place (sitting in our bedroom) one thing if we are absent from each other in the flesh (if spared) we are together in Spirit & the one Father will be with us & I trust will. all our loved ones. My thoughts are with all our dear ones in Melbourne & those in Nowra & wish them all much happiness in the coming year. Will dearest Jessie be spared to us.

Sunday 
The New Year is just in & I wish everybody good things. Late getting up this morning, not feeling well, spent a busy Sunday, Mr Sullivan was with us for dinner Enjoyed the Sunday School lessons very much, but had the feeling that I did not say as much to the children as I should have done. I must put things more plainly before them how much I feel my own weakness & long to lean upon God. Mr Jones preached a very good & profitable sermon. Ma McGregor Pa & family had tea with us Mr Hunt Tom S & Mary S. went home to Nowra, Georgie & Bruce with Ma. Jess & I read a while then retired about eight oclock.

Monday 2
Lovely morning, Jess got up first, While at breakfast Dubbs came & said Jess could go to B Creek with us, we hurried round & got our work done & Jess went to the Office where Uncle & I picked her up at 10 oclock, had a most pleasant drive to B Creek & was very pleased when we got there to find all the Dymock family there, all looking well & very glad to see us Mr D was just as kind & nice as ever & promised to come & see us soon, we spent a pleasant day with them wandering allover the place, Mama included. What true hearted friends the Dymocks are I cannot say how large a place they have in my heart We left B Creek for home about 5 oclock. I was much disappointed at not getting to see dear little Teecie's & dear Mags grave I was afraid to ask Uncle to go, it was not easy to pass without going. Roads wet & muddy coming home arrived safely & not sorry to be home. Aleck came just as we were going to bed, had his tea & talked a little to us. Bed is the best place (for me whatever).

Tuesday 3
Jess up first & got me a warm bath, got up & got breakfast felt so unwell after that I had to lie for a bit, very hot day, did not exert myself in the least. As soon as dinner was over Uncle & I drove down to Nowra went to the prayer meeting in the Wesleyan Church Mr Best gave the address & it was very refreshing. After we came out Tom Stafford & all the others wanted me to stay & go to Yalwal so Tom asked Uncle he was a bit vexed at first but very kindly let me stay. Went off to bed & prepared for an early rise.

Wednesday 4
Got up at 5, all but Mary S. she was not well enough. Bob Tom S Mr Hunt Georgie & I had breakfast & started off to Bobs shop to catch the coach all managed to pack in & started off very jolly had a most lovely day but rather a rough drive. The men had to walk a lot Was surprised to see Yalwal was such a pretty place, we went up the shaft where no woman had ever been before, it was grand. The walk to the Homeward Bound was rather steep & long saw the crushing machine at work Had dinner together, given peach pie very enticing? Had a little chat sitting in the shade I could not help thinking of dear Jess when I was at McPhersons, thinking of what she told me of them. All felt hungry so Tom S & Mr H started to look for a shop but failed to get anything eatable. Started for home about 4 o’c wanting something to eat enjoyed the drive home very well just a wee bit cold did not get home until after 8 oclock too late for Church was disappointed Had a good tea nice beef steak. Tom S prepared for leaving next morning (by Mainderry) by cleaning his boots all went off to bed believing that it was the best place for us.

Thursday 5
Had to get up in good time to see Tom Bruce & Mary S off by Coomenderry for Sydney felt very sorry to part with them, I wish good byes did not come so often But they show us plainly that this is not our abiding place Tom T & Mr Hunt went to the steamer with them & saw them off we watched for them off the balcony but missed the steamer much to our disgust. Uncle brought Grandfather down & UK [Uncle Kenneth] & Kate went down to the point with Frasers & Matthews fishing, had a lovely day but only brought one fish home. Geo did some washing & sewing & I made an apron for her. Mother busy (as usual) preparing for her trip to Sydney. After dinner Tom & Mr Hunt went to Cambe. Mr H went to say goodbye to Jess came back at 6 oclock had tea & worship enjoyed Toms prayer very much indeed & wish I was as earnest as he. Mother Grandfather Mr H Tom & I went to church in the Church of England, place full, Mr Dobbie addressed the meeting was very earnest & very nice Mr Best called on Tom to pray as usual his prayer was very earnest. All came home together & prepared for bed at once as Geo & Mr H to go by coach in the morning did not want them to go, Geo especially I often wonder why we cannot all live together, but it must be best as it is.

Friday 6
Mr Hunt Geo Mother Kate & I got up at 2 oclock, Tom a little later had a little breakfast with Geo & Mr H. Tom & I went to the coach with them, just in time to catch the coach which was nearly full. Saw them off safely & came home & went to bed & had a good sleep. Got up again at 7, lovely morning. They will have a lovely day for travelling. Set to work cleaned up after breakfast. I swept upstairs & Kate dusted, Mother scrubbed the hall & dining room would not let we do it she is preparing for her trip tomorrow, doing as much as possible for Kate. Mother is a most unselfish woman & there are few as good as she what a lot we owe to having such a good mother. Tom is preparing the sermon for Sunday in Dr Grants church. Grandfather has done his best at the pump & is having a quiet nap now. Mother Kate & Auntie M. went out visiting Auntie going to stay until Monday. Tom did some gardening & I some sewing got tea ready & then had a little read (Frances R Havergal) Went to prayer meeting & enjoyed it very well

Saturday 7
Mother left house a little past 8 for the point Grandfather went with her to steamer did not leave until 1 oclock Auntie Sam went out visiting. Kate & I had a wee sleep & in the afternoon Uncle K came & brought some nice peaches, great treat Tom & Uncle went to the McArthurs to tea. Kate & I had tea alone on the little round table & hoped no one would come to help us (selfish) Went for a walk after tea & called at Hewletts & then went to prayer meeting Mr Best sang [UNCLEAR] the whole meeting was nice. Came home & found the place very tidy after being away so long

Sunday 8
Did not get up until 8 oclock as there was no church had a nice time for reading & preparing for S School, enjoyed the morning very much Went to school trying to speak plainly to my children, tried with Gods help to make them see what a cheerful thing religion is. Mary Matthews came home with me & Uncle & I went back with her to tea. Went to Nowra. Tom preached the service to me was beautiful, long time since I enjoyed a service so much Tom was very earnest & did very well his text was in Rev. 21 "There shall be no night there" felt quite satisfied. When church was over 
longed to tell him how I at least enjoyed the service, got home safely & went straight to my room.

Monday 9
The sun soon made me aware that it was time to get up. How I enjoyed walking & feeling that I had had a good nights rest & that God had watched over me & spared me to see another day. I am always thankful to Tom for telling me never to neglect reading a short portion night & morning. I never remember neglecting to do so, it is to me a great means of peace & a great priviledge . I want to love to read the Bible more & more Had a busy day did a good lot of cooking & tidied up a bit. After tea went to the store & Jess was ready to come home with me, Uncle was at the Office so we all went up to Aunties for a cold lemon drink it was lovely. After we came home Aleck came & brought news that dear Jess had had a relapse & was in a critical but not hopeless state, sad sad news making us very anxious All is in Gods hands & He will do what is best for us. Poor Bob left this morning for Melbourne

Tuesday 10
No more news of dear Jess, how I hope Bob will get there in time for we have little hope of her, how hard it would be if she was called home & Bob not there, but God is good. Poor Ma Billis & all what an anxious time for them wish I could help them. It will be very hard if we had to part with dear Jessie Poor Bob. I do feel for him. They have been in my thoughts continually today. Oh the comfort of knowing that all is in Gods hands & that dear Jess is one of His Jewels. How good our Father is & yet how weak our love for Him is but the time will soon come when we shall be with Him & love Him as we ought. Katie & Becky McPaul got the Bible society card this evening I must pray earnestly for them that they may really love to read their Bibles & belong to Christ. Aleck came up after Office hours no more news of dear Jessie. Jessie & Uncle went to Nowra. Its time to prepare for bed Good night everybody

Wednesday 11
No more news of dear Jessie Have not got my diary yet & am tired of waiting for it therefore will not write much until I do get it.

Thursday 12
Dont remember what I did today, still no news of Jessie Good sign we hope Took Mrs Binks down to Dr King went up to Meroogal Mr Thompson & the children were, there. We had a cup of tea & stayed for an hour or so & Tom & Kate came came up home & had tea with us, & enjoyed a ramble round the garden & enjoyed peaches too, I went for a wee drive with them

Friday 13
Went to Uncle Matthews for tea as it was Marys birthday on Saturday but held it on Friday instead had a good game of croquet, a very nice tea, but rather a quiet evening, did not come home until after twelve wished Mary a very happy birthday & many of them little thinking what was going to happen on her birthday

Saturday 14
Trotted round a bit but did not bother myself much worked to keep myself from being over anxious about dear Jessie Uncle Matthews & Mary came up to tea, quite an event for Uncle, he went round the garden & ate nearly all the good fruit then went to practise. Dearest Jess died today but we did not know it

Sunday 15
Mr Dobbie preached in the morning & I played the organ, & was not a bit nervous, went to Frasers for dinner Mr Dobbie addressed the Sunday School, had a new scholar in my class. Went to Uncle M & Jessie came home with me. Went to hear Mr Par at night & enjoyed the service dear little Teecie was often in my mind the text reminding me "A little child shall lead them" How I long to see the dear little man

Monday 16
Did a great clearing up, scalded cockroaches, very tired when Uncle came & told me the sad sad news that dearest Jessie passed away on Saturday night, what were my feelings, dear dear Jess what will we do without her, poor poor Bob, & all her family, it is for her Ma & Bob I feel most, our loss is small compared with theirs & yet ours seems enough to bear. Better for dear Jessie altho we feel it so hard to part with her, she is with Jesus now.

Tuesday 17
Auntie M & I went to Nowra to see if there was any news of dear Jessie but there was no more, I did feel it hard to meet Kate & Tom & be able to control myself poor Jessie what a vacant place she has left, how many hearts are aching for her, but she will never have any more heartaches & no more pain, I fancy I see them all together dear Mag & Teecie, dear Winnie & John & dear Jessie, & all those of us who have gone before, what a happy meeting for them, I cannot help longing to be with them. Came home & had tea at Aunties & Mary & I went to the store to see about a dress for me, Mary McGregor came up to Uncle Matthews looking so well, Mary Matthews came home with me & we talked until very late. Mary is very sensible & has deeper thought than I expected. Jim Dick left Sydney today for Scotland poor fellow.

Wednesday 18
Jessie is so good to get up in the morning making me quite lazy. Mary trotted round & helped me a lot. Dearest Jessie is never out of my mind, & I am anxious about Bob & Ma. & all, I never remember realising with so much comfort that "Whom the Lord loveth He chasteneth" I feel that He has chastened us in love, oh that we all had that humble submissiveness to His will. Went to Aunties & watched Mary packing for her return to school, then went to the store & did my shopping Kate Fraser came up & had tea with us Went to Binks & they expressed their sympathy deeply grieved for our loss. Sympathy is sweet to the wounded heart

Thursday 19
Intended going to Nowra but Grandfather was sick so I stayed at home with Him. Auntie came up after dinner & I made her stay to tea. I feel so lonely & was very glad to have her. After she left I went to Binks & got the paper with the announcement of dear Jessie's death. What a sympathetic woman Mrs Binks is, it is very easy to see who is her master Got a short note from Belle, telling us a little about dear Jessie

Friday 20
Cleared up as usual and prepared for Saturday work

Saturday 21
Uncle went to the post & bought tomatoes & rhubarb after dinner he went for Tom & Kate how glad I was to have them We had a very nice tea together & after tea Jessie & I went to the Farm & Kate stayed with us, I was very sorry to leave Kate but had to go to Practise When I came home found she was sleeping in the chair We talked very much of dear Jessie Bob & all poor Kate it is hard for her She feels very much for Bob poor fellow it makes my heart sore to think of him

Sunday 22
Mr Par the new minister for B Creek preached Kate F played the organ, enjoyed the service very much a profatable sermon, all seemed pleased with him. Mr Welby & Mr Don came up & had tea with us & spent a pleasant evening went away at 7 oclock, we were very glad of their company as it kept us from thinking so much of dear Jessie We sat on the bed & talked for 2 hrs Kate Jessie McG & I.

Monday 23
Uncle decided to go to Sydney & after dinner I took Kate home & called & took Kate Fraser with us, she kept us quite cheerful, had tea at Nowra & Kate F came home & stayed with us all night we were very glad to have her, Uncle got away safely in the coach.

Tuesday 24
Made a cake for Ebby to take to School, & after dinner Grandfather & I went to Nowra to stay until Saturday when we got there Kate & I had to come back as the piano had to be tuned poor Kate payed for it by having a dreadful night of neuralgia

Wednesday 25
Bob expected home & we were dreading his coming poor fellow, it was hard for him did not get home until evening, I trembled when I saw him & was afraid to open the door Tom was with him Poor Bob kept so calm altho it was so hard I managed to keep the tears back but my heart aches for him We could not speak about dear Jessie Went to the prayer meeting

Thursday 26
Jim Dick went to see them in Melbourne on his way home Bob had to go down to Nowra but came back to dinner, how he must miss dear Jessie how calm he is outwardly but his looks & heavy sighs tell how hard it is, he is thin & old looking oh it is a heavy trial & yet it is all done in love In the evening he asked who would go for a walk round the showground Tom & I went with him & after we came in we asked him to tell us about dear Jessie Oh how sore it was for him, the tears would come to my eyes but I do not think he could see I was so afraid it might make it harder for him, if he saw us giving way, I love to hear him speak of dear Jess, he says she is released from pain now, poor Bob how I wish I could lighten your burden, but Gods knows how heavy it is He will help.

Friday 27
Bob had to go to work, hard it must have been for him God alone can comfort him Tom went to Greys after dinner & Kate Grandfather & I went to Uncle Johns & up to Barr Hill & got a lot of peaches. It was very hot but peaches were all we thought of Left Uncle Johns about 7 oclock, had a nice drive home, & surprised Bob & Tom with the fruit, Bob went to Hewletts for the night & he & Mr H were to go to Barr Hill in the morning for more fruit.

Saturday 28
Kate & I felt pretty stiff but got up in fair time & set out to work Kate made a lot of peach jam & I did upstairs for her & also other work After dinner Grandfather & I had to come home did not like leaving Kate & all & we were company for Bob too I think, Jess met us at the office with provisions very good of her Set to work after I came home. Had a kind letter from Bessie Matthews I miss dear Jess here & feel her loss very much more than I can tell, there seems such a blank what must it be for Bob when I have felt it hard to live through

[No entries for 29 - 31 January]

Wednesday Feb 1st 1888
Grandfather went out as I went down to Cambe to do some shopping met Kate Fraser & she made me go home with her to see Lill & Lucy Hodgkinson. I found them the same as usual, had a long chat of old & new times. What pleasure Lil & Lucy seem to go in for, will they ever turn their affections to better things. Had dinner with them & after went over & did my shopping, came back & Kate Fraser & I over to Browns & spent a pleasant little time, Jess came there & had tea there. I had to come home & get tea for Grandfather, & then went to meet Jess. Not sorry that the day was so nearly ended

Thursday 2
Grandfather & I went down to Nowra after dinner & met Auntie & Bob. Auntie of course going to Meroogal, poor Bob looks so old & troubled his loss is telling deeply on him, how God must love him, when He has afflicted him so. Yes God does love him, more that dear Jess ever could & He will bind up his wounds & soothe his sorrows & give him strength for every need. Kate made us stay all night & Jess was to go home with Auntie Kate & I went out for a drive, & brought some of dear Jessie things home in the buggy & brought Bob home from the shop. I would like to let him see how deeply I feel for him, & how keenly I too feel Jessies death

Friday 3
Kate & I hurried up with our work & brought Grandfather nearly home & then went to see Mrs W Miller found her very glad to see us & very kind, had a
long starve for dinner after which we started for the orchard & saw a little snake, Kate & I watched it while Mrs Miller got hot & poured it on the horrid thing & scalded it grandly. We talked a great deal of Jessie. We Got some lovely apples & brought some home What comfort Minnie Miller has, I wonder does she know that there is a better home which will always last does she think of it I wonder, I believe she does sometimes. I got home after six & worked till bed time

Saturday 4
Uncle Kenny came home from Sydney this morning, a very hot day indeed, had a letter from Geo. Cleaned up the house nicely & in the afternoon did some sewing, after that went to Binks & left the S.School Union cards for Rachel & Martha. I wonder how I will keep up their interest in reading them. No practise tonight, too warm, Jess came home with me.

Sunday 5
I went & cooked the dinner for Auntie & let her out to church & I thoroughly enjoyed the morning, reading & looking over the S School lessons & singing hymns. It rained after S School so we could not get down to Nowra to church was very sorry, but God orders all things for us therefore it must be best. Went to bed early & had a good sleep

Monday 6
I entered two cakes for B Creek show. I wonder if I will get a prize Uncle Grandpa & I went to Nowra this morning Kate had an awful lot for dinner. Bell was home from Melb. looking so thin & worn we stayed until evening & Dr Grant came & we had a happy time with him. Grandpa & I came in time to take Jess home. Jess & I unburdened our minds to each other both been misjudged by Uncle Kenny, it has made us more determined to do what we think is right & to be careful of our behaviour in gentlemans company. I am sure we want less than ever to think of them. There is not anything in this world living for but the one thing is to be entirely for Jesus & prepare for the next live where there will not be anything to pain & grieve us. Oh if people only knew how pleasant it is to live for Him. Many more would do so.

Tuesday 7
Little bit lazy this morning have not been well all day tidied up as usual & set to sewing finished my dress and made two aprons. Grandfather made up his mind to start for Pyree. I have not felt this day long it has been a pleasant day to me How I wish I could always have my mind occupied with better things I long to be better & to live entirely for Jesus. I feel that I am progressing slowly but surely I hope. Grandpa Jess & I went to Nowra Uncle & Jess went to Church & Mr Hewlet came up for a walk & took me down to meet them. Jess was sick coming home in the buggy

Wednesday 8
Indisposed again this morning & have been all day, Jess good creature that she is got up & lit the fire. I set to work to make my morning wrapper & have succeeded very well so far. Uncle very quiet & a bit done up, had a very silent tea, did my best to get a squeak out of him but he was speechless poor fellow Went to see Auntie after tea found her quite happy over her. work & Uncle as happy as a little king actually trying to sing. Jess bought two melons & we carried one home & oh did'nt we like it & Joe Nugent sent us lollies & figs they were delicious we went to bed after that.

Thursday 9
Actually got up a little after six & set to work at once & got nearly all my work done before breakfast, did Jessie hair for her felt very sorry that she had to go to the office. Made a seed cake for Auntie after dinner set to work at my gown & nearly finished it, it looks very spry. Its just awful Jess did not come home, & I wanted her badly, guess she wants me too, Its raining nearly cats & dogs, lovely weather for the grass. I wonder how poor Bob is, I sometimes cannot think that dear Jessie has gone from us never to return. Oh what a meeting is before us, when we all cross the river God is good to give us such hope for the future & also the comfort of knowing that our loved ones are asleep in Jesus.

Friday 10
Got on well with my work today & got my wrapper finished & it looks very nice. Went down town & ran into Kate Fraser, met Mrs Binks when coming home going to see a poor woman who is ill & off course Mrs B had her basket full, & she asked me if I would help poor Mrs Walters until she would be able to be about & work, I am glad that she asked me, & felt so ashamed & sorry that I did not enquire about her before & help her oh how humbled I feel when I think of all the good things I have & that poor creature in want oh how unspeakably good God is to me & how little I give Him in return & how little I help others, how I long to live only & always for Jesus, I feel that I must be entirely consecrated to Him. I do want to live entirely for Him.

Saturday 11
Raining all day I am afraid we will have a wet Sunday. Oh how I long to be consecrated entirely to God to give up my will at all times for His will, never to murmur & to be living nearer & nearer to Jesus, I feel that I cannot be satisfied until it is "all for Jesus". how good God is to give me such a longing after Him

Sunday 12
Got up at 6 oclock so as to have plenty time for reading & prayer. I find it much better not to hurried [sic] I should always try to make more & more time for devotion. Dr Grant preached a very dry sermon Very few out I enjoyed the S School lesson how careless the children often are, as tho they often never heard a word perhaps just when you are most earnest God knows how I do want them to learn about Him & love Him. Went over to Marys after S School enjoyed the quiet & lovely scenery. It makes one think how great our Creator is.

Monday 13  
Got up & went over to Aunties in the wet to get butter to make cakes for the 
show which turned out very well. Poor Jess very bad with Neuralgia, wish I could cure her, Grandfather very merry to day. I enjoyed reading Memorial of F.R. Havergal very, very much while watching the cakes oh to be as earnest as she was such a bright Christian she was the dead yet speaketh. I feel that I must be a real Christian not half & half, I want to be closer to Jesus & more like Him, how I am a very poor Christian doing so very little for Jesus, I want to be All for Jesus, it often comforts me when I think that it is God that gives us these desires, & He never gives a desire without meaning to satisfy it Jess came home early, I got a nice tea ready for her & we had nice melon & Uncle is such good humour I fed that Jess & I are being drawn nearer & nearer to each other

Shrove Tuesday 14
Up early as it was washing day Mrs McPaul came early & got to work in good time. I put all the white clothes through 4 or 5 waters & they came out somewhat different to the usual. Got Mrs McPaul to scrub & clean up a bit, Minnie came to stay all night. Had a letter from Tom Stafford Mary ill again, poor thing, Also a very very nice letter from Jim McKenzie really did me good he is I believe a true cousin & friend. Uncle & Jess off to choral practise as usual & poor Jess still bad with Neuralgia. Jess had a letter from Lizzie Kellet & Tory Noakes I went down to Binks, fancy cakes look very nice I am anxious to get the prize want the money to pay my debts. Good night.

Ash Wednesday 15
Tired out this evening after a big ironing. Poor Min got her eye hurt down at Noakes (by a dog) she fainted giving us a little turn, but she managed to walk home I was not at all well & nearly managed a faint, thankful I did not though. Took my cakes down to Binks after night. Uncle had a ramble round the Mts getting walking sticks rather done up after it. Had a good sleep. Took powders to cure myself Jess read as Uncle was in his room. How very thankful I feel to God for His great goodness. He is a present help in trouble.

Thursday 16
Hurried up with the work & took Grandfather to see Mrs Gibson & went on to Nowra myself very hot. Found Kate & Belle at home Kate looking quite tired out poor thing. Belle & I took my dress to the Dressmaker. Came home at about 5 oclock picked Mrs Binks up at Browns. Jess came home but no word of my cakes. Uncle told me about Annie & he & gave me the letter to read in which she confessed she did not care for him, very sorry for Uncle yet I know it is best, Rachel & Martha Binks came up to tell me that I had got first prize for seed cake. Thankful.

Friday 17
Uncle & Jess went to the show & Grandfather to the farm & I prepared dinner for Kate & Bell Mr Hollis & Tom. They all managed to come & Nellie too, we spent a pleasant day, Mr Hollis & Tom pelting each other with grapes, & at last we all followed their bad example & did the same. Mr Hollis helped to gather up, & dried the dishes for me. All like him I went home to Nowra with them (Tom walked), we did a little singing in the buggy. Found Uncle & Jess & Bob & Mrs Shepherd at tea. Uncle & Jess went to choral & Kate Mr Hollis & Bob & I went after in the buggy, hardly any there so had only a little practise. Stayed at Nowra all night.

Saturday 18
 Jess Uncle & I came home from Nowra this morning. I started bravely to work at once & got the place in good order & went to Binks & brought my cakes home,
Jess tired & could not walk up here for dinner & me sleepy about 12 when we went to bed last night. Mr Hollis & Tom came up with Auntie & stayed here all night.

Sunday 19
Went to hear Mr Par in the morning Text Nahum 3 Verse 1 Chap. Mr Hollis Uncle Jess & I went to Uncle Sams for dinner. Tom came to Sunday School & took a class Oh did'nt I enjoy the lessons today, what a priviledge to be allowed to teach & I so ignorant myself. Mr Dow preached Text  1 Psalm very good & enjoyable. Stayed all night with us. Bob Tom Mr Hollis Mary & Rosy had tea with us

Monday 20
Got up in decent time had an early breakfast Mr Dow went away with Jessie I roasted a fowl & made 4 big cakes for the show busy all day, Uncle ordered the Lords Prayer. Uncle thinks Mr Dow is not a real Christian so I think Uncle & Jess & I went to Nowra & found them all out so we locked up the place & Mr Hollis got in the dining room window, we spent a pleasant evening singing & playing. Made Mr Hollis wind wool for Jessie. Mr H got Jess & my handkerchiefs & made them smell of tobacco. Jess did not sleep much, I did tho, like a top & so did some of the others

Tuesday 21
Up at half past five all astir at six had breakfast & worship & started off for the boat about 7 oclock were in plenty time watched the fishes for a while & then started off up the river was a lovely day & we all enjoyed it well, I talked a good deal to the Captain & Engineer & felt that I had helped them to pass the time more pleasantly, this assurance was sweet, I felt the day was not wasted, oh to ease others burdens more, Jess & Mr Hollis seemed to enjoy themselves, also Tom Bell Uncle & Nellie, we got back to the wharf at 3 oclock. After tea, Uncle Jess Tom Mr Hollis Kate & I went to the Choral practise, Jess got sick & nearly fainted, poor child but 
almost recovered when we got home

Wednesday 22
Minnie & Mary Binks awoke us about half past five just when we were enjoying a good sleep Uncle went for greenery for the show building. Jess Min & I went to the grapes vines. I made more cakes for the show, but did not do as well as I wanted, went to the store, got shoes & a wrapper for Jess, waited for coach & Mr Hollis came, he had missed the morning coach poor fellow we were glad to see him again, hope he will reach home safely. I feel very down hearted this evening. I feel that nothing can satisfy me but the one thing needful, I long for more & more love, I long to realise how much God does love me, & want to love Him more & more, how thankful I am that He does not love me for my own sake (but for Jesus sake) because there is not anything in me to love not anything attractive, not anything that would make people love me, oh to be more conformed to His image

Thursday 23
My heart is heavy & humbled as I see how much God has done & is still doing for me, real distress has taken me. I cannot express myself, but I have cried in deep distress feeling what a cumberer I am so useless, doing so little in the world it seems to me as tho I was not a help to anyone Oh Father make me a true useful Christian Uncle Grandfather & I went to Nowra to the show I got new shoes for Jessie. Got third prize for collection of cakes Annie Miller came in to see us Johnny Walters stayed all night had a little music.

Friday 24
Up rather late Annie Miller came & stayed until we all went out to the show. Got my dress from Mrs Pattersons, very nice plain & neat. Enjoyed the show very well Georgie Nugent rode Johnny Walters horse J. Walters got second prize for riding looked splendid Uncle stayed down for the Orange meeting & Tom came home with Grandfather & me, very stormy & a little rain Had a little talk about proper behaviour. Had worship & went to bed feeling very tired.

Saturday 25
Did not get up until 7 oclock Tom not up until after eight. Did no cooking to day, but cleaned up as usual & set to writing letters after dinner Wrote to Effie Annie Fraser & Bessie Matthews Went to see Auntie & Uncle Sam, Ma & Pa came when I was there Aleck McG came home with me

Sunday 26
Dr Grant came early in the morning & Uncle took him up to the Mill to preach I stayed from Sunday School to get the Dr a cup of tea, he praised it very much but would not sit down to take it but much to my amusement stood up all the time dear old man. Mr Graham preached in the afternoon, like him fairly well went to bed early & had a most delightful sleep, Sunday is a precious day

Monday 27
Made grape jam first thing cleaned up the house & did some cooking, & then after dinner started off to walk to Mas, met Jess on the road in all the heat, felt very hot when I reached Ma washing day, helped to fold the clothes, Uncle Kenny came with the buggy, & got a good many quinces, Uncle Aleck came after tea Uncle Kenny Min & Aleck came over, Jess brought the buggy back & her dress stuff. Ma started & cut it out at once, I was glad to have Jess with me, stayed all night & slept on the boys bed, no snakes came to carry me off, heard (of course) several peculiar noises through the night did not sleep very well

Tuesday 28
Got up early dressed prayed & read & then went to work for the day, Oh the comfort of having God to watch over us all day, to have Him to go to with every care. His goodness is beyond any human power to tell. I am so thankful that He has made me to feel He is so precious, & long to see all my loved ones & others belonging to Him. I cooked & did nearly all the house work for Ma, while she got at Jessies dress. Jess stayed over with us & Aleck went to the office. Ma & Jess & I all worked at Jessies dress & got it nearly finished, Jess had to go to help at the B Creek concert (Sacred) He took her over & then came back & took me home after tea Wrote to Annie a kinder letter at Pa suggestion Very tired & sleepy & ready for rest

Wednesday 29
Late up, not feeling extra lively, Uncle & Jess did not come home until this morning. I preserved 5 bottles of Quinces boiled them in the boiler to try, they look very nice Made a nice white apron after dinner & have just had a little practise Grandfather not very well When I sit down to sew often I think of those loved ones who have gone & long & long to see them or be with them I cannot think of dear loving little Teecie without feeling grieved, it was hard to loose him, but oh God does not [sic] best and we dare not murmur He has been so good to us, & we do want His will to be done in us

Thursday March 1st 1888
Up early Grandfather & Uncle went to B Creek to the induction of Mr Jackson, they enjoyed the day splendidly. I was at home alone made Quince Jam preserved some quinces & a bottle of grape Just as I was finishing Ma, Pa, & Tom came & I had no dinner cooked we managed a very good dinner though All enjoyed grapes Ma & I did a lot to Jessie wrapper All stayed for tea & Jess came home for tea Jess Tom Uncle & I spent a very pleasant evening plenty music darned the tablecloth Very happy all day, at perfect peace with God, oh how precious religion is, there is not anything in this life worth anything only religion

Friday 2
Up before six this morning, felt better but feet tired got Tom & Uncle to help to cut quinces for preserving did 7 bottles & made lovely quince jelly, first I have made, after dinner made another lot Uncle wants me to send it to the show. Tom went over to the Farm. Very tired after so much work today. Bell & Kate came just as we were going to have tea, had a jolly time together, ate plenty grapes & melon they say my jelly cant be beat, Uncle seems very proud over it. Tom & Jess came home & we ate a large melon Saw in the paper that the Oiraya [sic] arrived at Plymouth after 83 days. So the Dr is safely land in Scotland ere this

Saturday 3
Cleaned up the pantry from top to toe & gave the tables & extra scrubbing. All so clean & tidy. Tired though Uncle Tom & I very jolly at dinner had asthma with laughing its so nice to be really happy together, for we know all real happiness comes from God. Had a very fair practise

Sunday 4
Grandfather & Uncle went to Nowra to Church Tom & I stayed at home & I played hymns both went to Sunday School. Belle came home with Uncle Tom preached at night a powerful & very earnest sermon I enjoyed it & oh what a sinner I felt & am a very good congregation

Monday  5   
Slept by myself last night (had a bit of a weep) slept very well got up at six Got the work done in good time Belle made all the beds it was such a help. After dinner Belle & Uncle went to Nowra & Tom over to the farm I felt tired so had a good rest & read. The old Helmet went to the store in the afternoon had a talk to Joe Nugent through the telephone & came home with Jess to tea Uncle nice & jolly Grandfather not very well Pa came over with Tom. Uncle & Tom & Pa took the lantern & went off to the grapes. The garden is very interesting at present (Grapes)

Tuesday 6
Up in decent time did very little cleaning today Tom went up the Mt shooting Uncle stayed to clean the buggy I made a seed cake for the K Valley show Uncle pulled a lot of grapes to take to Nugent & Watts & I packed them for him. Nellie & Jessie came home to tea Tom shot 3 pigeons & 1 parrot. Uncle & Tom went down to Nowra sorry to part with Tom dont know what we will do without him Grandfather not extra well commenced a letter to Lill Billis

Wednesday 7
Got up at 5 oclock to see Uncle off to Moss Vale very stormy morning & a little rain, but cleared up beautifully as was almost a perfect day Mrs McPaul came to wash did well this time got her to stop for ironing & whitewashing, lifted the carpet in the parlor, made all lovely & clean. Jess came home to tea (sore throat) Mary Binks brought us roasters Jess did some ironing, all hands tired, had worship & went to bed at nine oclock

Thursday 8
Lazy this morning, got to ironing early & finished in nice time cleaned myself before dinner & did the darning made an apron for Jess after dinner Went down in the evening to the store Jess Grandfather & I went up to Aunties to tea I stayed for Jess got second prize for the cake not anything for jam or jelly Georgie Nugent had a very long faint

Friday 9
Did some cooking & cleaned up a few, cleaned the meat cover after being dirty for months. Mrs Binks & Mr Binks came up to tea, went over & had some grapes Uncle came home in good time & brought from Moss Vale two bottles bush honey some apples & new potatoes, we spent a pleasant evening, when Mr & Mrs Binks went away Uncle told us what the Watts thought of Annies behaviour How Uncle seems to feel it keenly, but it is better for him

Saturday 10
Did the usual cooking & cleaning Uncle went down to the coach thinking 
W.T. Dick might come but alas disappointed so after dinner Uncle & I started out for Nowra & met Belle & Tom on the way Tom came with me & Uncle & Belle came home we were home in time for tea then Tom & Belle went home

Sunday 11
Up in decent time prepared the Sunday School lessons Mr Dobbie preached did not enjoy the service as would like went to Frasers for dinner after S School went to see Mrs Brown & the new baby then Grandfather & I had tea at Auntie & went to hear Mr Parr at night enjoyed the service well As usual brought Grandfather home on my arm

Monday 12
Indisposed this morning Grandfather went to Auntie & Uncle to paint Grannys grave Pa & Nellie came & took me to Nowra with them found Belle Kate & Tom preparing to go out so I went down to McArthurs & Pa went farther down Terrara had a good chat with Maggie & Alice, Maggie was in her room, had been very bad with Bronchitis. Came home & got dinner for Uncle in the evening, after washing up felt very bad so went to bed & after a little sleep felt better Tom & Aleck came up & I got up for a while Then we had worship I will be sorry when Tom goes he always expresses himself so simple in prayer, just seems to express my wants too

Tuesday 13
Up pretty early as Tom Uncle & Aleck were going out shooting Tom dressed in the Drs suit failing to fill it, they started in high glee I laid the oilcloth in the passage made some apple jelly & it was very nice Wrote to Georgie. The boys came home in good time & had dinner in the evening & Uncle & Jess went to Choral & Tom to Dr Grants. Had a letter from Vergie first since dear Jessie went home opening the wound & making me long to see dearest Mag Teecie & Jessie oh the happiness & comfort when we think we will soon be with them

Wednesday 14
Posted Jim McKenzie letter. Tom went the rounds saying goodbye. I do not like to think that he will not be going in & out here as he used to I do feel his going very much this time I wonder when we will all be together again will there be another missing when we meet next. Very hot day & I read all day for a change "Alone" I felt that I had benefited by what I have read. After tea went down & told Kate Fraser that we could not go to her evening party tomorrow, Jessie practising for the concert in aid of the benevolent society

Thursday 15
Very hot morning Uncle Grandfather & I went to Nowra & stayed all day Tom & Uncle went to McArthurs in the afternoon Tom went to say goodbye. We shall miss Tom very much this time he has been so good & always brought such cheer into the house I do not like the thought of him going at all Dear Tom. Jess rode down in the evening & stayed all night Watched Tom packing. Tom & [I] walked to Nowra & Uncle & Grandpa brought the luggage down in the buggy. We said goodbye to Tom at the corner of the Post Office street (Secambes) I could not help thinking that Tom felt he might not see Grandfather here again. We had to leave Tom & come home

Friday 16
Lovely cool morning for Tom to go to Sydney he had a great scramble to get away, he will be at St Andrews now, poor fellow he will be missing Adam very much I can sympathize with them. I made a little quince jelly for ourselves, & two lots for Mrs Binks. Uncle has been working all day at dear old Grannys grave. Grandfather went away to McLarens & is not home yet poor old man his time must be nearly come the morning will soon break upon him Jess came home at dinner time, I wonder what we would do without her. Tired tonight. How we are all scattered Bob will be on the sea tonight

Saturday 17
Jess & I both up in good time lovely cool morning but windy Uncle cleaned the meat covers for me I covered Mrs Binks jelly Bella Harper & Kate Fraser came up to tea & then we all went to practise had a very good practice Aleck came home with me

Sunday 18
Did not go out to church in the morning, went to S School as usual, how I feel my own weakness Mr Jackson preached in the afternoon a splendid sermon Collossians 1 Chap 12+13 Verses Belle & Uncle Grandfather & I & Mr Jackson had tea at Auntie's then Belle Auntie Mr Jackson & I went to the Sunday night meeting in the School of Arts

Monday 19
Belle stayed last night, Mr Jackson & Uncle went out visiting & came here for dinner we had a pleasant time together we like Mr Jackson very much Uncle & he went out again after dinner & met Mr Dobbie a [UNCLEAR] All went out to Mr Crabbs Temperance lecture like him very much & we started the Templar Lodge again. The Choir sang some hymns & I sang the Solo Where is my wandering boy tonight I wonder if my singing did any one good I tried to sing entirely for my Master oh how I long to be useful in His vineyard, but I am such a poor Christian

Tuesday 20
Lazy to get up after last nights dissappation Made puff paste for the first time & succeeded very well. Very tired & sleepy Belle came over in the evening to get Jessies dress for the concert Jess wore my white skirt & her velvet body looked very nice Went to Mr Crabs lecture on "Happy Homes” it was grand indeed he is a clever man. All the Officers were elected for the Lodge I hope we will all be faithful & keep the vows we have taken I am Past Worthy Chief Templar. Very late getting home, & tired & sleepy

Wednesday 21
Lazy again lost too much sleep. Expecting the Nugents They came just in time for dinner & with Jess from the office we spent a pleasant day together Joe is nicer the more you see of her, she seems such a good solid girl & I love her very much WE had our last melon it was very nice, stayed up until all hours & talked as girls will do. I wish I could show my love for people more I cannot express myself & often think people must think me cold. Uncle read the 14 Chap of John what a beautiful chapter it is what comfort in it

Thursday 22
Up before six this morning as the Nugent wanted to get away early Uncle went with them as he wanted to hear Mr Crabs lecture on “Happy Homes”. After they left I got my work done & tried to have a sleep but failed so went down to Jessie McLarens & got dinner ready for her as she was busy. Enjoyed the day very well It is just 9 years today since I came to Cambe what a long time ago, well I remember the day I left home it was a great trial, but how much good has come out of it all, I wonder how much longer will I be here.

Friday 23
Late up, after a good sleep, not very much inclined for work either. Had a good practise before dinner Uncle not home from the Valley yet, poor Grandfather no well again, he is getting very shaky. I am thinking we will loose him soon Better for him. We will miss him greatly tho I ought to be better to him I feel I do so little for him & for everyone else too I am a poor worker in the vineyard not worthy to be in it. Uncle waited in the Valley to hear Mr Crabb again

Saturday 24
When we were seated at breakfast Uncle walked in & surprised us, he seems to think a great deal of Joe Nugent. I took it easy today went to see if I could help Mrs Binks in the afternoon, had a very fair practise tonight & learnt some new tunes

Palm Sunday 25
No church this morning. Very hot day. Mr Jones preached for the last time this afternoon. Miss Crawford came to teach Sunday School Lessons very short but very enjoyable. I often think that altho I say so little for Jesus one word with Him is as good as a thousand

Monday 26
Up early this morning & made tarts for Mrs Binks for Mr Jones farewell tea meeting also made a good many other cakes & Mrs Binks was so pleased I wish I was as good as she is, I do so little & my love for the Master is very small, oh to love Him above everything to have His love always above & self underneath no one can know how I long to serve Him better & do His will & to let my feeble light shine I do long to see others enjoying His service. I do wish Belle would give herself to Him entirely. I think & hope that Kate is His. Wont it be a happy day when they come out on the Lords side

Tuesday 27
Went down to Binks & helped pack the cakes & cut the tongues ready for sandwiches After dinner went to Nowra in the cart with Mr & Mrs Binks & made the sandwiches at home Very good tea meeting, lots left over. The Address were given in the Wesleyan Church Mr Jones address the best of all, sorry he is leaving. Could not help wishes that dear Jess was with us & thought of all our loved ones in Heaven with Jesus, & felt that they would not want to come back & we would soon be with them. Said goodbye to Kate as she was going to Moss Vale on Thursday

Wednesday 28
Did not do much today felt a wee tired Mr James brought the Lords prayer framed seemed a nice man & Pa's friend. Went down town in the afternoon & Mr Burr & Jim Nugent came had a little chat to them. How often people say I must be lonely here, they do not know how I enjoy staying here I feel contented & very happy in a quiet way I feel that all this happiness is God gift & I am so thankful to Him for His great goodness Oh how often I sin against Him, Jesus is the master on Him all our sins are laid, how very precious He is. Commenced more of a birthday letter for Katie Billis, poor Katie what trouble has fallen to her but it is Gods will therefore it is good.

Thursday 29
Lovely morning up early, washing day Mrs McPaul tried the new way of washing & was done nice & early & did nearly all the ironing. Uncle went to the Collectors meeting at B Creek. I was at Binks for dinner Mr & Mrs Jones were there for the last time before going away spent quite a pleasant time together. Mr Jones amusing himself teasing me about the Presbyterians. Went to Good Templars & had a very fair meeting Jess & Uncle were enjoying some music when I came home.

Good Friday 30
Up at five oclock & Uncle & I started for the Valley driving Uncle did not let me walk up the Mt Met the coach Tory Noakes in it Got over to the Valley about half past eight all glad to see us Jess came over riding. (We were at church when she came) how glad they were to have her. We had great talks, all the men folk were practising rifle shooting, had music at night & did not go to bed until about 12 or one oclock rained heavily Joe is nicer ever time I see her

Saturday 31
Uncle & Jess left at six oclock I got up & watched Joe making up the mail After dinner Jim Nugent Jimmy/Jenny White & Harry Williams came with me Jim came nearly home with me Grandfather & Uncle had tea before I got home. Not much practise tonight all tired out

Easter Sunday April 1st 1888
Lovely morning Mr Parr preached we helped the Quoir [sic] to sing & anthem After Sunday school I went in to Mrs Browns & nursed the baby for a long time. Went to bed at 8 oclock. Uncle away at the farm. Two new girls came into my class.

Easter Monday 2
Uncle went to the Valley Jess at home Grandfather went out so I went down to see Belle & Bob, very quiet day we spent I came home in time to take Jess home. Tory Noakes came up & stayed all night with us Katie Billis birthday poor Kate, I hope they have all had a happy Easter. I cannot look at poor Bob without thinking of his loss & feeling very sorry for him how lonely he must feel & how much he must miss dearest Jessie

Easter Tuesday 3
Up early. Did a lot of cooking & tidied up a bit. Grandfather bad again to day poor old man methinks he will not be very long with us Jack Young came after dinner & is staying all night he seems very sensible. Had a grand letter from Tom how he always remembers to give us good advice he thinks we are healthy Christians. God grant that we may always ( & all) be so we should serve him with our whole heart & soul for He is so good to us poor wretched sinners

Wednesday 4
Minnie stayed last night & got up first & lit the fires quite a treat for me we have had lovely rain Jess had to turn out in it this morning poor creature. I wrote to Mr Hunt & congratulated him on his success. Jack Young did not go away until after dinner I wrote to Uncle Tommy to Georgie & Tom, enjoyed writing so much especially tonight, Uncle went for Jess he is so good now

Thursday 5
Grandfather & I went down to Nowra early. Belle busy as a bee too much for her to do poor girl she never seems to get a rest, we packed most of dear Jessie's things I kept an apron & bodice & a few little things dear Jessie I cannot realise she is gone, she was so good to me so gentle & loving, poor Bob I cannot express how I feel for him, today was a hard day for him dear Bob how lonely he must be we can only lighten his sorrow by pleading for him often at the Throne of Grace, what a comfort to be able to take everything to God in Prayer, & know He hears & knows all. Belle & Bob went to Hays in the evening

Friday 6
Made tomato jam & currant cake had a very busy morning while in the midst of it Mary Ann & Jim Thorburn came I made them stay for dinner & was glad they came. I wonder do they ever think of Jesus as their Saviour, I am sorry to see the careless of their never dying souls, & yet how many never seem to think of such a thing. After dinner Belle & Ma came. I did not let Belle read Toms letter, she seemed hurt & oh how it pained me, & I did wish so much that I had given it to her, it might have done her good. I am always doing something wrong & grieving the Holy Spirit Oh to be better to be more like Jesus to rest entirely on Him & to cease from sinning

Saturday 7
Up early very busy. Uncle bought a lot of rhubarb & I had to preserve it eight bottles. I feel tired there seems always to be plenty of work & I guess I make more, but I could not be happy without it had a nice letter from Geo dear old girl she is so tender hearted & loving how deeply she feels the losses we have had. May God comfort her & bring her nearer to Him. I long to see Belle resting in Jesus, she would find everything in Him.

Sunday 8
Lovely morning Dr Grant preached 17 Matthew very good sermon. Dinner at Auntie's Tried to do my duty to the children Lesson Christs last warning. I have not warned them as I should have done but I do want to do right & teach them. God grant that they may soon be His children.

9 Monday 
Up early busy all the morning made a custard for Willie Knight who is so ill Mrs Binks & I went to see him after dinner poor boy his sufferings are nearly at an end I think but he has great hope in his loving Saviour, his poor Mother I would like to comfort her, God can comfort her, & He will do it He has promised to comfort His children & His promises cannot fail, oh what a comfort to have Jesus for our best Friend. Quite tired after the long walk & yet much better for the walk.

Tuesday 10
Made quince dumpling for dinner, first time I ever made them. Grandfather & Uncle & Jess went to Nowra & I went down to Jessie McLarens & stayed until they came back All away at McLarens so I got in the window & made a fire & got the tea ready. Jessie was very tired when she came home & very glad to find me there How nice it is to be useful & how useful some people are, always thoughtful for other not selfish like me. Yet I love to do for people, lazy very often tho

Wednesday 11
Up early & made puff paste the morning was too warm, therefore the paste was not as good as usual Made scones & soda bread for Belle Very quiet all day without Grandfather. William Bauerlin came & had tea with us & interested us very much telling us of his travels, wish I knew half as much as he knows. Uncle brought 6 new mumbles & nice apples helping me out of my difficulty about having a second course for dinner Uncle is very very good, home is not right without him now

Thursday 12
Uncle & I went down to Nowra when Jess went to the Office & we went round the recreation grounds for a drive, found Belle up to her eyes in work with the place nice & clean. The S of Arts sewing meeting met there in the afternoon Met Mrs Dr King but did not care for her too much high church came home to Good Templars Rev Mr Glasson was there Jess & some others were initiated. Walter Hodgkinson & Mr Morton were also with us. Jess & I sang a duet & some other played & sang & gave reading so we had an enjoyable night

Friday 13
No up to the mark this morning. Jess got up & got breakfast which I appreciated very much indeed. I am trying to take care of myself & eating plain food hope I will keep at it. Did the usual work & prepared for Saturday. Got a bath ready for Jessie & Uncle went for her & they brought Tory Noakes back with them

Saturday 14
Beautiful morning. Set to work nice & early so as to be ready for Joe Nugent Uncle & I went to the top of the Mt to meet her, it was lovely & we were so glad to have Joe with us. We got home safely & I went to practise & left Joe Jess & Uncle at home. Tomorrow is my birthday. I am leaving the old year behind

Sunday 15
My birthday 23 how old I am getting oh to be living nearer to God I pray that the New Year I have just entered will be one of active consecration to God. Jess got up & put all the presents before my door giving me a surprise I did not expect so many. Tom wrote me such a good letter. What a little I have done in the past for Jesus. Toms letters make me even think more seriously & I will try with Gods help to keep the good resolutions. I am so• terribly weak & such a great great sinner Mr Jackson Belle Bob & Nellie came home to tea with us. They all went to Nowra to Church Joe & I had such a good talk she is so good

Monday 16
Up early for Joe to get away Uncle went with her over the Mt Mr Jackson Jess Grandfather & I had breakfast together & had a nice talk Mr. J then went out visiting came back & about 11 oclock Uncle & he had lunch & went out to do more visiting. I walked over to the farm helped Mary a little. Got a nice tea ready & when we were nearly finished Mr Jackson & Uncle came they had tea, & then we had worship together. I came home with Jessie very tired Jess read & then we went to our rooms. God has been so good to me today. He has helped me thro all the trial & temptation the little trials are the hardest to bear

17  Tuesday 
Beautiful morning little foggy. Uncle went to finish painting Grannies grave & Jess went to her work as usual poor old chick has a sore toe dont know what we would do without Jess. Had a very nice letter from Virgie today, a good letter. Just came when I was feeling lonely & sad I long & long to be more in communion with God to overcome sin & to be like Jesus every day I make many slips but I must persevere I must be more like Jesus & do more for Him, & do it in the right spirit. My longings today are beyond expression. I wonder is anyone as weak & sinful & I & so unworthy Mrs McLaren came in the afternoon, brought me a nice big piece of butter. Heard the new W minister for the first time Mr Glasson a real Wesleyan

Wednesday 18
Uncle & William Byerline [sic] went up the Mt for the day. Grandfather went to Gibsons & I spent nearly all the day at Uncle Matthews made a currant cake & some scones for Auntie. Auntie gave me muslin & lace for two aprons, which was very kind of her. We had dinner in the evening Uncle & Jess just came home in time, I went for Jess after & went by Binks & they ask me to go in for a while as it was the class meeting, I stayed a little while, cannot enter into these meetings somehow, suppose because I am not a Wesleyan

Thursday 19
Washing morning I got the clothes on before Mrs McPaul came so we got the washing & ironing done in one day felt very tired. Uncle & Jess went to the Work Society tea meeting & Grandfather & I went down & had a nice tea with Mrs Binks. Mr Binks put up a kick because Grandfather came. We stayed for a while & then came home & had worship & went to bed feeling ready for it. Had a letter from dear old Lill poor girl. She is feeling dear Jessie’s death now, I wish I could make it easier for her, but she is Gods child & He knows best

Friday 20
Up in decent time this morning Jess sleepy after the bunstruggle Worked hard at my load & finished it. Went down to Binks for a walk Grandfather & I went down to Aunties after tea I went to Frasers first I wish I could express myself well, often I long to express my feeling & wishes but cannot I do feel so ignorant Phillip & Mrs Morton stayed late at Aunties we came home because we wanted to go to bed early & prepare for Saturday. How secure we feel when we lay down to sleep having Our Father promise that he will keep us

Saturday 21
Up at daylight to make puff paste, did a lot of cooking today & sent a few tartlets & scones to Mrs Binks She says she does not know when she will be able to pay me while she have already given me the most

Sunday 22
Uncle took the Rev George Lane down to Nowra, I went out into the paddocks for a walk & prepared my Sunday School lesson enjoyed the morning very much poor Grandfather felt very lonely Mr Binks preached in the morning, only a week since my birthday, I feel that I have done a little better but not anything like I ought

Monday 23
Up at daylight & got a lot of work done before breakfast, a most beautiful day. I commenced to turn an old dress for morning Mag & Pearlie Tait came up & had tea with us, & we had a nice quiet evening. What a comfort to have the promise that God is with us always when we know & feel He is with us we do not feel lonely when we have no other company & it is so sweet to be able to turn to Christ at all times and be sure of his help Minnie Dubbs & Tory came & stayed all night

Tuesday 24
Up early Minnie helped me with some of the work & I got the old dress all ript up & ironed ready for operation. After dinner went down to Mrs Binks & worked the bread & put into tins & mixed the buns & put them in tins. Then Mrs Binks & I had a quiet chat, these chats I always enjoy, she is so far ahead of you & such a pattern to others. Grandfather went to Nowra & I am going with Jess & Uncle this evening & I actually feel a bit excited, & longing to get there Belle & I stayed at home at Meroogal & Bob went to the lecture

Wednesday 25
I helped Belle with the work & then she cut out a dress for Nellie & I helped her with it Mr & Mrs Hewlett & all the children came in the evening & when they left Miss Cooper & Edgar Hunt came to stay for a few days. Grandpa went to Pyree & Bob to Yalwal. Miss Cooper Uncle & I went out to the, prayer meeting it was Dr Grant, very nice but rather profound I feel that God is helping me to live better I have had many struggles to keep from showing temper, oh I am so thankful that Dr will helped [sic] me to show a better example to others

Thursday 26
Up first cooked cakes scones & soda bread for Belle. What comforts we have here in this house Meroogal, I wonder how we dare to murmur, when we have so much, just innumerable blessings, Belle went to the sewing meeting & I came home. Had tea at Frasers & enjoyed it very much Went to Good Templar had a good night, Jess sang nicely Marguarite & I sang the Lighthouse Light We had to stay all night by ourselves, but we were not afraid, God watches over His children

Friday 27
Jess & I had a nice little breakfast to ourselves I did the Saturday work so that I could go back to Nowra Went to Mrs Binks for dinner Mag Tait and Pearlie came up after dinner Mary Binks helped me to catch the horse & we all started off together they were glad to see me in Nowra again After tea Belle & I went down town & stayed at Hewletts for a while Came home & went to bed

Saturday 28
Up in decent time did some cooking for Belle & she gave 1/- Miss Cooper Edgar Hunt & Grandfather & I came up to Cambe after dinner Made fritters for tea went to practise as usual

Sunday 29
Up late lovely morning no church, went to Sunday School enjoyed the lessons, & hope & pray that the children may benefit by them Went to see Mrs Vidler Mr Jackson preached at night a splendid sermon from 2nd Chap Revelations

Monday 30
Uncle Miss Cooper & Edgar & I went down to Nowra, Uncle decided to take Bob 
up to Moss Vale & bring Kate back, I had tea at Frasers with Mrs Bray & Hetty & then went part of the way home with them & said goodbye as they are leaving for England in a few days I wonder shall we ever meet here again, I could not help thinking of it when saying goodbye. I trust we shall meet in the Great Beyond. Tory Minnie & Dubbs stayed all night

Tuesday May 1st 1888
Cleaned up this morning & went to do my usual three months shopping succeeded very well Mag Pearlie & Auntie came up & stayed for tea I think Mag has improved I made fritters for tea & they like them so much. Jess Grandfather & I got ready to go to Nowra but were disappointed, Pas buggy was to come for us & it never came, Jess & I went to Frasers & Auntie & Mag came there too, Jess & I went to bed early

Wednesday 2
Up early & got all the work done ready to go over to the farm, but the buggy did not come until nearly 11 oclock Ma & Pa came out nearly 2 oclock when we got to the farm I made two blue satin pincushions for Jo Nugent, her birthday is tomorrow, Jess is busy making a handkerchief sachet & horseshoe pincushion. Pa & Williams & Grandfather came to home to the farm for tea so I made a dish of fritters & Pa says they were the best he had tasted for a long time, it is nice to spend a day at the farm with Ma & Pa the house looks fresh now, they have just papered it poor Ma works too hard, wish I could help her

Thursday 3
About the first thought this morning was that it is Joes birthday, I trust it will be a happy one & that the coming year or years may be very happy, the happiness alone which comes from the true source Jo is a true Christian. I made the jacket of my morning dress. Went for Jess & had a talk to Jo, she could not thank us for the present, she said she felt as I did on my birthday & at night said she felt so happy she could not go to bed. I can imagine how she felt, & it was true happiness I know

Friday 4
Up early & made melon ginger & melon jam worked all day made cakes & scones, made a cake for Ma but it was not good. In the evening Minnie Miller & Miss Noel came, they stayed to tea & we had a very pleasant time I went for Jess & when we came home we prepared more melon ginger & then went to bed after worship. God has indeed been my helper through this day, I want to live more for Him & He alone can make me to do so

Saturday 5
More melon ginger roasted a fowl nicely for tea when Uncle comes home from Nowra Ebb came up in the afternoon & brought me a letter from Jim McKenzie which I was very glad to get Uncle brought some apples from Mrs Walters Aleck stayed all night

Sunday 6
Very cold morning & day Dr Grant preached very deep but a lot of teaching in it, I failed to catch much of it poor Mr Shepherd told me of his difficulties today at S School he fears he will have to leave, it would be a very great loss to us all would be very sorry but he says "The Lord will provide" there is always comfort to be found if we only look the right way for it

Monday 7
Did not hurry as I thought Uncle was not going to Nowra but he did go & I had to go tea [sic] Kate looks fairly well after her trip she came with Aleck to his Ma's last night. I had a lazy day yesterday made a few scones & cakes for Belle who was working away like a nigger poor girl. Oh Father make her Thy child & comfort her & help her Jess broke doz. eggs but did'nt get the stick. Minnie came up & stayed all night I payed the bakers bill & had a look over the bakery. Had worship & went to bed.

Tuesday 8
Up early Mrs McPaul could not come to wash, so I turned to & made apple & melon jam, roasted a fowl for Belle made three kinds of scones, sent some to Auntie & a good many for Belle baked sago & apple & washed a boiler of things had a regular day of it. This morning I knew what a busy day I would have & I put all into Gods hands & I have got on so well, I wish I did always have God to undertake everything for me instead of trying often myself. Oh how I hate myself & the sin that does so easily beset me

Wednesday 9
Kate stayed last night, Jess & I came home early this morning from Nowra Mrs McPaul did the washing, Kate Pa Rachel Binks & I went out gooseberry hunting had a great scramble got a bag full each, Kate & I had about 24 lbs had some lunch with Mr Binks on his new farm. When we came home Mrs McPaul had the ironing nearly done which was very nice for me. Kate & I had a good wash & felt quite refreshed & pleased with our days work. After tea shelled the gooseberries, had a little music & then went to meet Jess, talked nearly half the night.

Thursday 10
All felt better than we expected Kate & I did a little sewing then went to the store & bought a new dress for me went up to Auntie & had dinner Grandfather too, after dinner went to Frasers for a little while then I went to Binks & got Jess bible. Kate came home & we had a cosy tea together. Kate nearly finished a pretty apron for me. I gave her muslin for an apron, I was sorry to go to Good Templars & leave Kate alone with Grandfather for company. Had a very good meeting, bad hours tho. Tomorrow is Jessie birthday, I wonder if she feels as I felt, she is entering upon a new year & I hope it will be a peaceful & happy one

Friday 11
Up early so as to have a nice breakfast for Jess, gave Jess a Bible & some other things which amused her very much, I did give her the best gift I could think of. I know it will be very precious to her, Kate had to go home & I miss her much. Made Gooseberry & melon jam mixed lovely & Gooseberry by itself, very nice, Uncle came home from Nowra. Met Jess at the style coming home to tea both went to Aunties & then Auntie & Ebb came to the office Jess showed us all her present, a nice lot. Letter from Tom S & Tom Thorburn, such a nice one from the latter, It did me good as well as Jess, he says be good never mind what others are, be good & that is what I do want to be. I often do not know how to live I am very blind & ignorant & want oh so much light

Saturday 12
Up early got the melon ginger on early finish making all this Frasers jam & am not a bit sorry. Made a lot of scones & sent some to Mrs Binks, she sent me a tumbler of gooseberry jam making me feel very much ashamed. Jess came home for dinner Beautiful rain nearly all day. Jess did not come home tonight too wet

Sunday 13
Lovely morning up early went to church morning & evening enjoyed both services. Bell & Kate came up to hear Mr Jackson Auntie Sam came up & had tea with us Jess & I went to bed early. I cannot express myself how I wish I could it would be such a relief

Monday 14
Up before daylight mopped out before breakfast, made the skirt of morning dress, quite a relief to get it done Uncle & George Lumsden got wood all day splendid lot, Uncle making very sad faces bad with toothache. Belle came in the evening to get me to go down to Nowra with her she took Mrs McPaul with her for a week to clean up the place we found Kate & Ethel Hewlett at home Mr Taylor & Bob away

Tuesday 15
Had a good rest this morning finished my morning jacket then made a good many scones which Belle & Kate pronounced good they say I am a good hand at scones. I am thankful I did not feel proud but then I cannot take the credit to myself. I cannot keep myself humble, strength must come from the Giver of all good things, I in myself am very weak & helpless & oh so sinful. Went to Ma's & tried to persuade her to go down to Nowra soon. Took a look at Auntie & then came home

Wednesday 16
Up early as Auntie Matthews & all of us were going to B Creek. Uncle & Grandfather went together & I drove Auntie they went to Mr Jacksons for dinner We went to dearest Mag & Teecies grave & I got some Chrysanthemums off the grave standing beside the grave I felt how safe they are in Gods keeping, what a blessed reunion when we are all gathered home. Oh that we may all be as well prepared as they were. Went to the church, very few there only 6 women Mr English Mr McLay Uncle Kenny & Robert Sheperd were elected as elders what a solemn time it must be for them as they take new responsibilities upon themselves. We got home safely & better for the outing

Thursday 17
This morning Uncle Grandfather & I went to church to Nowra Mr Jackson preached Sunday is the sacrement it makes me feel very serious, Lord Jesus prepare me to sit at Thy table I long for Sunday to come I long for the priviledge of once more communicating & bringing to mind what Jesus has done for us & how He commanded us to Do this in rememberance of Him Lord help me to examine myself I cannot do it myself Mr Jackson implored us to think & ask ourselves if our profession was real if so to hold to it, how earnest & faithfully he preached today, it has been a day of great blessing, a sacred time

Friday 18
Jessie did not come home last night Did most of my Saturday work as tomorrow DV we go to church. Went down to see Mrs Binks William Byerline & Uncle were out all day, did not come home until after dark Nellie came to stay all night I feel so tired tonight & weary too

Saturday 19
Up in decent time finished up the usual Saturday work & then we all went to Nowra to church Mr Osborne preached Text "abide in me & I in you" he was so nice & I enjoyed the service very much after the tokens were given & the service over I went home with the Greys & we spent a most pleasant afternoon I did not get to Meroogal until late they were in bed & rather alarmed when they heard a noise I am looking forward to tomorrow looking forward to the Communion God is good to give us such priviledges.

Whitsun Day 20
Lovely morning. I feel that Jesus has prepared me to sit at His table, oh how good He is to me, a poor helpless sinner with no good thing of my own. Mr Osborne text was Peters fall (the three books) the whole service was so helpful & I feel strengthened more for the battle of life, I cannot express the joy of the whole service. Lord prepare me for what thou-art preparing for me. Mr Osborne sermon was so good & refreshing tonight "choose ye whom ye will serve how faithfully he pleaded to those who had not been with us at the Lords table I felt deeply touched when in his prayer he said Lord answer all our prayers it seemed to help me when I felt so weak

Whit Monday 21
 Mr Osborne preached the thanksgiving service this morning he has been faithful here, in warning & encouraging. Text "This is the work of God that ye believe in Him whom He hath sent" (Faith) what instruction he gave, I can say truly that it has been good to be in the House of God such a sacred sweet season of Communion it has been, never so precious to me. Oh how much we need Jesus to watch over us to strengthen & keep us from evil Lord help me to live entirely for thee & bring all our loved ones to serve thee too. We cannot be too close to Jesus or keep our lamps too brightly burning. I fear mine is a feeble & flickering light. Jesus knows all, He want me & that is surely enough. I could not help thinking & wondering if we would ever see & know Mr Osborne again & then came the thought we will meet him in Heaven, I would like to have told him how much I enjoyed his services, he went away by afternoon coach I went to Ma

Whit Tuesday 22
Ma & Pa went to Nowra to day. I wonder how long Ma will stay & what will come of this visit. I have been busy today cooking & so forth, such a white frost this morning. Uncle went to choral practice by himself, sent scones to Kate, Uncle actually said they were good Good Templars tonight but it was my duty to stay with Grandfather Jessie went. I am going to write to Tom Stafford I wish Geo Tom & Mother had been with us last Sunday how they would have enjoyed it. Trimmed an old hat for Jessie today. I hope to get some sewing done this week it is my free week Went to bed early

Wednesday 23
Up in good time all alone today. Uncle went out gooseberry hunting. I got 34 lbs we were tired shelling took two hours. I lengthened my wrapper. Jess came home with the news that Alice McArthur intends coming on Tuesday & Tom & Bert Dick coming from Sydney Saturday or Monday. Jess brought lollies & dates from Joe I have lots of work before me but God has given me the work & it is a priviledge to be allowed to work for Him

Thursday 24
Making jam from six oclock in the morning until six at night. Uncle & Jess went to Nowra Pa came up & had dinner & took Grandfather out for a drive Very tired lovely moonlight took a run out to see Mrs Binks

Friday 25
Rather lazy this morning. Took the carpet up out of the bedroom & gave it a good clean out Busy all day. Belle came up in the evening to dress Minnie & Jessie for the childrens concert they both looked very nice to my fancy of course the best looking there Jess sang a solo ("all alone") for the first time & brought down the house we were quite pleased with her. The concert was all very good We were not sorry to get to bed though

Saturday 26
Tired but very busy this morning made a stock of ginger nuts. Uncle bought a lot of apples Preserved some gooseberries & made gooseberry tarts which were very nice Went to Uncle Matthews & Mary came to the store Mrs Browns & practise with me

Trinity Sunday 27
All went out but me nice little time at Sunday School Mr Jackson preached at night a real good earnest sermon came home with us & we had such a nice long talk until 11 oclock he will do good I am sure

Monday 28
Made a mistake & wrote on the 4 of June that should have been here

[There are no entries for 29 May-3 June except an entry for 13 June is written in the space for 29 May. It is not clear so far if she continued the daily entries under the wrong dates]

Tuesday 29
13 June [hand written]
Went to Nowra & had a long chat with Belle & Kate Saw Berts & Mr Barnets bunches brought Belle home with me & was very glad to have her

Monday 4
[This is entry for 28 May] It is not clear if these entries are on the correct dates or not]
Jess up first washing. Uncle & Mr Jackson went out visiting & to Dr Grants Finish the washing & ironing early & Mrs McPaul is coming tomorrow Jess was up to dinner & Dubbs, he has a nasty cold

Tuesday 5
Very busy Mrs McPaul came & scrubbed & whitewashed the fireplaces I did a lot of cooking prepared for the coming visitors. Went to hear Rev Mr Glasson at night & enjoyed the sermon very well Alice McArthur Jessie & Uncle came home after I was in bed, so I got up to see them, it ended in us being very late to bed
 
Wednesday 6
Uncle went to meet Tom & Bert Dick & they all went to Broughton Creek together to see Mr Jackson Alice Grandfather & I went over to Uncle Sams for dinner Mary came home with us & we got dinner in the evening. Tom Bert & Uncle came home I was a little shy with Bert & so was he, he is very tall nice looking & I believe nice, reminds me so much of Adam in his ways William came up & brought his microscope Late getting to bed

Thursday 7
Up in Good time. Uncle Tom Bert Ebbie Mary Jessie Alice & Pa & I went up the Mt went round by Baldys & then to the top had a lovely day. Came back & had tea at Baldys. Lovely scones & butter Tom & Bert walked home & we came in the buggy. Uncle & Bert had a great argument about Theatres There is a lot in Bert he appears to be very sensible. After Jess & Tom came a while we managed to stop the talk & had a little music

Friday 8
Late up. Tom & Uncle went up to the white rock Bert Alice & I stayed at home & did work. They plucked the cockatoo while I cooked & swept. Jess came home at dinner we three sat a long time at dinner, then dressed & went to Uncle Sams When we got a little way saw what we believe •to be Mr Dobbie I should have come back but did not Bert lectured me about it would not let us stay long at Uncles came home & Bert wrote our names on the cactus. Had a nice evening singing & playing

Saturday 9
Decent early breakfast Bert Alice & I sat a long time talking & then B sang Rocked in the cradle of the deep many times Wrote they [sic] names in my text book. Tom went to Uncle Sams After dinner we talked & sang & then they had to go & I felt sorry & miss them so. I like Bert very much. I wish Tom was here enjoyed Alices stay very much

Sunday 10
I have to play for Mr Dobbie today, got on very fairly better than I thought. Mary M came up to tea & Uncle told us that Ma had a daughter on Friday & we did not know a word until today Jess & Pa & Min went down to see the little wonder I have been worrying myself today about things & now they have turned out better than I hoped for my worrying was of no use

Monday 11
Very busy today, we intend going to Jervis Bay tomorrow (D.V.) - I have roasted two fowls & made scones to take with us, Uncle got a tooth drawn today & he feels bad as most men do when they have a little pain. Bob Ebbie M Bert Dick & Mr Barnet went to Yalwal this morning. Very rainy looking today. Poured rain tonight very much afraid we will not get to the Bay tomorrow. Mr Jackson came about 9 oclock in all the rain, got lost for about an hour & a half we spent a very pleasant evening together Went to bed feeling much afraid of the weather

Tuesday 12
Up at about five oclock, cloudy but we prepared for going to Jervis Bay had a great run round started off about 7 oclock & when we got to Nowra they were not ready. We started about 9 oclock from Nowra Uncle K Mr Jackson Bob Tom Mr Barnet & Bert Dick Belle Kate Jess & I had a very pleasant drive singing & reading Rained while we were preparing the lunch, but cleared up nicely after We had a lovely walk on the beach the Bay looked lovely. Tom & Mr Barnet carried us over a creek on their backs, great fun. We all enjoyed the day grandly & were very jolly coming home, had real good singing. Mr Jackson was very nice Bert gave me a little lecture on my duty to Grandfather which I enjoyed very much. Jess & Uncle had to come home I was sorry for Jess

Wednesday 13
Raining this morning so all stayed at home had music etc. I brought baby down for Bert Tom & Mr Barnet to see Bert nursed her Mr Barnet is very nice indeed & so is Bert we are real friends now. In the evening we played “Dominoes.” Belle Tom & Mr Barnet against Kate & Bert & I, we were the best players of course we all got very excited & enjoyed the games very much, I made gruel for supper first time Bert had ever tasted it he liked it & so did Mr Barnet

Thursday 14
Wet again Bert stayed at home & Tom & Mr Barnet went out to the swamp shooting shot 13 birds did not come home until 4 oclock. Bert & Belle & Kate & I had a great day to ourselves. Bert Belle & I started out in the coach for McArthurs went round by Nowra & enjoyed the drive. Tom Kate & Mr Barnet & Bert sang very nicely & behaved nicely too. The McArthurs were awfully tired making us feel ashamed. I sang "Mary of Argyle" We played Dominoes but did not enjoy them very much Came home at half past ten. Not very pleased with our evening

Friday 15
Tom & Mr Barnet & Bert had a fight ended in Bert hurting his fingers & Tom his lip. Tom & Mr Barnet went & cut a lot of wood. Bert went to Nowra came home & asked me to come & talk to him. Asked me how I enjoyed last night we both gave our opinion which was not much both disgusted with the loudness. Bert said my song was the best of the night said he could have thrown me on the floor it was so good clapped his hands & actually thanked me. Very glad he appreciated it. After dinner Tom & Mr B went up the Mt & Bert & I brought the wood home gave me a ride in the barrow; had a long talk sitting on the wood about his Mother & those we have lost & also of ourselves. Jess came down & we had a very pleasant evening together for the last evening

Saturday 16
Had to come away early Bert & Mr B got up to say good bye to us, they came up to the top of the hill above the Bridge we enjoyed a good chat ask Mr B for a parting lecture told us to be good boys we said we could'nt & he said to be good little boys then, Bert said all was taken on the little words "Be good" & Mr B said so too. So we are to be good, had to say good bye. Bert made us take our glove off. Very sorry to loose them, last we saw was their hats, I feel so thankful that God had given us such a good time together Oh He has been so good to us

Sunday 17
Feel very sick this morning went to Mr Par in the morning very comforting Had to take the small children at Sunday School Mr Jackson in the afternoon very nice indeed he & all of us Jess too went to Aunties for tea

Monday 18
Went to see Mrs McLaren in the morning, found her with a bad cold & not able to work, helped her a little came home early did a little singing & playing. Pa came & stayed all the evening was feeling so lonely & glad to see him. William had tea with us & Jess came home to tea & we had a look through the microscope Very glad when bed time came Grandfather went away this morning & never said when, & is not home yet, I feel a little anxious

Tuesday 19 
Up at half past six did a good deal of work cooking etc. I feel so lonely today would give a good deal to see some of my own & a great friend. Very windy Jessie woke me when she came home from Nowra & told me that Belle & Kate went with the boys & they had a splendid time & they were sorry to part. Both say they will come again & Bert says Meroogal is his home now & we are all his mothers X X

[NB- loose piece of note paper inserted between these pages: The Baby referred to in line 2 of 13th June ’88 is my mother Margaret Macgregor who was born upstairs in the big balcony Bedroom on 1st June 1888.
Mr Barnet, youngest son of James Barnet on his first visit from St Andrew’s College was later to marry my aunt Jessie Macgregor.
Bert Dick was a young doctor & Uni friend of Uncle Thomas Thorburn]

Wednesday 20
Back to the right place again sorry I missed those few leaves. Geo & Bruce are with me since Monday we are having great times Bruce is more loving than he used to be good little fellow. It is nice to have them here, our tongues will soon be worn out. Kate had a letter from Bert on Saturday. Jess & I got an invitation to Annie Frasers wedding today

Thursday 21
Very blowy did not bother with much work spent the afternoon with Georgie both sewing, oh it is nice to have her & Brucie William Bauerlin came to tea & then I went with Uncle & he to Good Templars we had an open night & it was fairly good. Very cold coming home Aleck stayed all night

Friday 22
Windy again trotted round a bit this morning we had a nice day to ourselves Uncle out collecting Bruce & I went down to the store, Bruce looked very nice & was admired a good deal Very sorry to hear of the sudden death of one of the Chisholms killed by a tree poor fellow. I wonder if he was prepared for death. Wrote to his sister Mary Ann Oh what a warning for us, oh Father make us ready to be called away, at any moment it makes me long to live closer to Jesus & I hope my letter will be of some comfort Oh that they may all be turned to God

Saturday 23
Geo helped me a lot & finished her dress too, I have enjoyed having her with me We went down to Binks for a little while, I had to go to practice & leave Geo. Annie Fraser & I had a good talk about her coming marriage

Sunday 24
Lovely lovely morning Bruce & I went for a walk I took my Bible prepared my lessons & had a good read, enjoyed it so much. Went to hear the great Matthew Burnet at night was a bit disappointed in him, Bruce was a good boy at church

Monday 25
Lizzie Kellet stayed last night with us had me playing & singing this morning for her Geo Bruce & I went to Nowra & Bob wished me to go to B Creek to a mason's dinner with Dr King Kate & himself We went and enjoyed the evening very much Went to see Miss Jackson & liked her Kate & I did enjoy ourselves.  Dr King was so nice I felt that last night did us good Not home until a little after one

Tuesday 26
Rather sleepy this morning. Mother came home with me when we got to Jessie's office she told us that Uncle Sam had talked to her about me, said I went out too much & there was not enough doing whatever he meant I feel that it was decidedly impertinent of him to interfere with what is not his business. I felt deeply misjudged but am still more determined to leave all in Gods hands & ask Him to direct my path I have trying [sic] too to do better to make home more happy & others happy too, God knows all, oh what a comfort to turn to Him for sympathy & help He is truly the help of those who are cast down Oh to love & serve Him more

Wednesday 27
Busy cooking & tidying up & made melon Ginger for Pa. Had a letter yesterday from Bert Dick asking me to practise singing had he commanded me to do it perhaps I would have rebelled but the way he has put it makes me feel that it is my duty to make good use of my voice, that it is a talent for me to make good use of. Oh how I have wasted it so far. Father tho alone can help me to use it aright now. I feel so weak myself, & feel that I need Jesus to do all for me

Thursday 28
Very white frost today Uncle went to B Creek & Grandfather to McKays so I was left alone, lovely day. About half past twelve Kate Georgie & Bruce came very glad to see them, we sat sewing & talking nearly all the afternoon I made a watch pocket for Bert Dick. Saw them off about five oclock sorry they cant stay Uncle did not come home from B Creek until after nine oclock

Friday 29
Did the usual Saturday work or at least work for Saturday. Had a good practise Kenny & Mary Matthews came up went for a little walk, then they helped me to prepare melon for melon ginger. Nothing of much interest going on

Saturday 30
Busy all day Uncle went to Nowra in the morning Annie Fraser came up to tea for the last time. We had a great chat went to practise, had a very good practise Aleck came home & stayed with me Jess went to Nowra

Sunday July 1st 1888
I had to play & sing this morning for Dr Grant got on better than I expected Dr Grant preached splendidly what a lovely day Sunday is, such rest & peace all went to Uncle Sams for dinner I did not care for going came out to hear Mr Parr at night & he was splendid so fearless a real brave Christian man

Monday 2
Little rain this morning. Pa came & took Grandfather & I over to the farm I set to work tidied & swept up & got dinner in the evening & Uncle came we had a comfortable little time together I brought the washing over to be done here Pa drove us over Jess & I had a little practise had worship & went to bed & talked for a good while. Oh how hard it is to be a woman, a real woman. I long to be good a true humble earnest Christian & I know Jess does the same

Tuesday 3
Still a little rain Uncle gave me £ this morning I did my usual Tuesdays cooking & brushed up my dresses & after dinner made a pretty pink satin nightdress sachet for Annie Fraser. Wrote a note to Kate, I had a splendid long practise singing & playing tonight. I am very thankful to Bert for writing & asking me to practise Oh I hope that God will help me to use this talent for His glory. Jess & Uncle away at choral practise. Commenced a letter to Belle & Geo.

Wednesday 4
Mrs McPaul did the washing. I damped & prepared for ironing

Thursday 5
In the morning ironed Jessies muslin & a good many things In the afternoon went down to help decorate the church for Annie Frasers wedding Mrs Brown & I washed & dried all the dishes for the wedding the church & School of Arts looked very nice. Kate came up in the evening & stayed, we were very glad of her company

Friday 6
Up in decent time commenced to dress at 10 oclock got to the church at the proper time church full. All passed off well, Annie looked much as usual did not seem very nervous Mr Bennet well I dont know what to think of him, The breakfast & all passed off well but we were disgusted with Mr Freckelton & with Charlie Bennet & Mr Robinson they are not gentlemen We stayed until 12 at night

Saturday 7
Felt tired and very lazy to get up this morning. Kate helped me with the work Uncle took her home after dinner We all went to practise at night & were very much annoyed with the behaviour of the above mentioned men

Sunday 8
Mr Parr preached this morning very nice Short S School in the afternoon Mr Jackson preached & we enjoyed him as usual. He spoke of the sin of neglecting to use our talent for music (when we have it) I felt almost as tho someone had told him I had been doing it. Meeting about dividing the checque Nowra & B Creek

Monday 9
Uncle away up the Mt as usual Busy at something all day promised Mrs Binks to help & wait on the table at the Orangemens tea on the 12th Had a fine letter from Jim McKenzie it has done me good Uncle brought Jess home had some music went to bed & Jess & I talked & laughed more perhaps than was good for us

Tuesday 10
Up in decent time Janie Binks came up & we did a lot of cooking for the Orangemens tea Were quite proud of our sponge rolls Tired tonight Jess & Uncle at choral practise as usual Wrote to Bert Dick very tired

Wednesday 11
Grandfather & I went down to Nowra Baby has grown & got fat Mrs McKay Miss Cooper & the children came when I was there I came home alone & was here by myself until after dark Pa & Grandfather came just after tea I started out to practise Kate Fraser Jess & I stayed in the church talking for a while I felt sorry for Kate left without a sister near her

Thursday 12
Made scones for the Orangemans tea after dinner went to Binks & got everything ready to go up to the Hall Laid the tables before six & they looked very nice About 160 at the tea we were kept pretty busy Mr Par gave a lecture after on Hugh Latimer the Martyr of Oxford, we enjoyed it very well Jess & I were nervous singing The Christian Martyr Did not get home until half past eleven

Friday 13
Not up early after last nights dissappation lovely morning. I did some cleaning up & after dinner went down to the store & got a new Jacket. Raining splendidly. Grandfather stayed at McLeans all night We all went to the Congregational meeting & decided that Mr Jackson have equal rights with Dr Grant quite a harmonious meeting after all the fuss Dr Grant has made over nothing

Saturday 14
Made melon ginger & orange jam today busy all day did not go out to practise tonight not well enough its nice to have a quite Saturday night at home. Practised today Wrote to Bell & Georgie

Sunday 15
Uncle went to the Valley to hear Mr Jackson Mr Bob Shepherd said goodbye to the S School children, he was very much affected & we felt deeply sorry to loose him Uncle Matthews is to be Superintendent in his place we do not care for the change Charlie Bordman preached on Sunday K Fraser came up & had tea with us & we had a long talk

Monday 16
Pa brought the buggy over this morning for me I went over & Minnie Aleck & I cleaned the house out made it so clean & smelt so sweet for Ma & Baby to come into tomorrow poor Ma she will feel the difference between the two houses Aleck & I walked home I am dreadfully tired but I dont mind that as long as I have been a help to Ma. Got tea for Grandfather when I came home & Uncle & I sat chatting while I prepared melon for melon ginger

Tuesday 17
Tired this morning cleaned out the stove made melon ginger baked a lot of scones & soda bread William came up & trimmed the grape vines I had a good practise this evening. I do wish I had more expression that when I sing it might do others good I feel so stupid when I think of how little I can do, of what little use I am compared with others, a poor frail sinful creature needing Jesus every moment of my life oh to live always & only for Him. Commenced a birthday letter to Tom

Wednesday 18
Went down the town after dinner, did a little shopping went to see Kate Fraser & had a long chat to her she misses Annie very much, went up to see Polly Matthews & she came part of the way home with me Prepared for washing

Thursday 19
Washing & ironing done to day William & Pa here for tea I went down to Binks in the evening & had dinner with them Mrs Bob Shepherd & family there sorry Mr Shepherd could not come Went to Good Templars meeting too long. Mary M joined Glad to get home

Friday 20
Busy all day getting things in good order for Mother Mrs Shepherd called in the morning to say goodbye Uncle shot 3 ducks William here for tea again Very tired went out to meet Jess. Jess brought the news that Alice Purdie is very ill poor girl I do feel sorry for her & hope she will recover again oh how careful we should be to live so as to be ready when the summons comes for us to go home I wish to live better

Saturday 21
Up in good time make ginger & did a lot of cooking for Mother roasted the Ducks & sent two to Nowra expected Mother up but was very much disappointed she did not come Went to practise & had a very good one too

Sunday 22
Did not go out until Sunday School Uncle Sams first day as Superintendent Mr Jackson preached at night & was just splendid, it did me good to hear him, he explains the Scriptures so well

Monday 23
Deeply grieved this morning to hear that Alice Purdie died on Saturday, poor things what a terrible blow it must be to them, oh I do feel very very sorry for them. God alone can comfort them I went to Nowra with Uncle when he was going to the funeral Mother came home with Uncle & I stayed down in her place Kate & I went to see Mrs [UNCLEAR] she seems such a nice old lady

Tuesday 24
Kate & I did a little cooking. Jim Thorburn & Mrs Miller & Miss Noel came in the afternoon & the two latter stayed all night we talk a great deal about old times & enjoyed ourselves. Miss Noel amused us by telling us stories about Prince Alfreds Hospital & the students. She was nurse there

Wednesday 25
Minnie & Miss Noel went home & Kate & I went to Nowra Park after dinner While we were away Mrs King called & in the evening Dick Cook (from Sydney) & Sydney Miller came & found all of us out, so they had their tea down town & waited about until we came home about 9 oclock were so sorry we did not come earlier when we found them there, however we spent a pleasant evening together

Thursday 26
I went down for Lilly Sydney early to get her to come & help with the work as we intended taking the boys out for a drive but however they had to go to B Creek early & we could not go, we like them especially Dick Cook he seems very nice, he said he was sorry he could not stay longer. In the evening Kate & I went to Dr Kings Mrs Morton & Phillip Morton were there, we had dinner about 8 oclock great display of silver but the cooking not very grand, we spent rather a pleasant evening played one game of cards grew rather excited over it

Friday 27
No very bright after so much dissapation, Bob went to B Creek in the evening Kate & I went out for a walk & talked about Bert & how shy he was when he came down first Mrs McArthur, Jim & Miss Wheatley came up & spent the evening. (Pa came for tea but could not stay) had some music Bob very tired & sleepy Kate packed dear Jessies things for Bob to take home to Melbourne poor things

Saturday 28
Got our work done before dinner Mother & Uncle came after dinner Kate Uncle & I went to the football match then Uncle & I came home, Mother left all clean & tidy for me what a good good mother she is. I do not prize her one half as much as I ought. Jess came home as it was wet

Sunday 29
Dr Grant preached this morning Text Be careful for nothing etc. it was not as simple as I would have liked. Had a very good time at Sunday School after which Mary Matthews Uncle Jess & I went over to the farm to see Ma & baby, baby is growing a fine girl, poor Ma has her hands full

Monday 30
Up early cleaned up the kitchen & pantry well. Went down to Binks in the afternoon to make doughnuts & they had no flour Uncle brought home six pigeons took two to Uncle Sam I had a good practise had a nice fire in the parlor making everything look cheerful Oh the goodness of God, to us undeserving creatures, what comforts we enjoy & yet how unthankful we are

Tuesday 31
Did a lot of cooking today, went down to see Jessie McLaren in the afternoon felt afraid to go but strength was given poor Jessie well I know how she feels the heavy sighs tell how the heart is aching she said I did her good & I am so thankful & feel that God had been so kind in using me to do something for Him. Poor things how they will miss Alice. Tonight I could hardly sing for thinking, Alices death seems to have brought back dear Mags & dear Jessie death Oh that we may all be prepared when our summons comes Alice is now with the in Heaven, Oh the comfort of knowing they are safe Read over dearest Mag and Jessie letters & had a good cry. Oh to be wholly consecrated & sanctified to live all all for Jesus.

Wednesday Aug 1st 1888
Tidied up the old dairy today made the jams tidy it all looks so nice tidy & clean Pa came over for dinner & Uncle & he drew out a nice plan for their new house I did my usual 3 months shopping. Bitterly cold this evening. Uncle & I had a great chat at tea & how we are very cosy in the parlor with a nice fire on Had nice music when Jess came we did not want to go to bed were enjoying ourselves so well

Thursday 2
Uncle went over to the farm so Grandfather Mrs Binks & I went to Nowra Kate no doubt was glad to see us she read part of the letter she was writing to J Dick After dinner she had to go to the sewing meeting & we left soon after We planned what to cook to send to Tom & Mrs Binks very kindly said she would make a sponge cake Good Templars had a fairly good meeting

Friday 3
Did some washing myself curtains etc after dinner went over to say goodbye to Mary & Uncle as they are to leave tomorrow for the Bellinger Mary & I had a fine long chat came home & Ironed Jess came home & brought a letter from Tom & Bert for me enjoyed both, surprised to get another from Bert so soon very good of him. Tom is preparing for his final exam hope he does well Jess & I had some music all to ourselves

Saturday 4
Usual Saturday work, but it did not worry me as it generally does worrying is one of my failings, but I hope in time by Gods help to overcome it Had a good practise

Sunday 5
Mr Par preached this morning Text "In all these afflictions he was afflicted & the angel of his presence saved them" very comforting cheering service Mr Jackson in the afternoon Text The parable of the sower splendid he seems to have a. word for everyone oh how I wish I was a better Christian, a poor specimen of a Christian I am I wonder how anyone can care for me God does & that is enough

Monday 6
Came on to rain today its lovely to see it made doughnuts Uncle went to the Valley to hear Rev J Barnier lecture Kate came up & took Grandfather & I to Nowra, rather a damp drive Mr Taylor stayed until pretty late talking to us, he is a strange man It was nice to be home with Kate, Jess stayed at Uncle Sams all night Oh how God has protected & kept us this day His goodness is inexpressionable Our Father what comfort in those two words giving such a feeling of safety

Tuesday 7
Kate went down to Nowra to pay off her bills & I did the work Had a nasty billious attack, really ill Kate dosed me as well as possible its horrible Uncle came down at night & was not in good humor Snapped me up, oh when will there be peace I hate these sparing [sic] way I try to do things well & make him comfortable & happy I know I fail often but why does he snap until I am in dread of him, Oh I wish that hard crust would melt away that he would be kind & charitable I have tried & tried to make life easier & happier for him, but my efforts seem almost in vain. But oh God know. He know the longing for peace & harmony. Kate was very vexed with Uncle, I went off & cried big baby that I am but I felt hurt

Wednesday 8
Kate made puff paste this morning & I did the work after dinner She had to go to a meeting Mr Shepherd had to drive Grandfather & I home I went down to Mrs Binks & she gave me a nice large sponge cake for Tom William came home with Jess

Thursday 9
Up early Uncle went to B Creek to a meeting about a new manse I made cakes for Tom succeeded very well Pa was with me for a while In the evening Mr Hewlett & Mr Blewit (Mr H assistant) came up & took Jess & me down to the silver reading we enjoyed the drive splendidly. Jess Kate & I sang at the silver reading & Jess playing people seemed pleased but I was not very pleased Late when we got home Uncle brought us apples oranges & pineapple Were not sorry to retire

Friday 10
Up early again Uncle went to the farm & I made scones for Tom & they were very nice then I took all the things to Nowra & we packed the box & took it to the shop & then we saw it had gone off safely hope Tom will get it safely I took Kate for a little drive down to Terrara then she came home with me a good way over the bridge & walked back Went to bed early

Saturday 11
This is Belle's birthday hope it will be a happy day for her No cooking today so I just clean out the house well had a little note from Tom telling us he expected just to get thro with his final exam I am beginning to picture all the Students sitting at tea enjoying the good things Tom has for them

Sunday 12
Auntie Matthews came up for dinner & wash up for me as I had to hurry off to S School Mr Glasson preached I did not enjoy the service [crossed out] as I should have done After church Uncle Grandfather & I went up & had tea with Auntie

Monday 13
Grandfather & Auntie went down to Bolong & Grandpa went on to Nowra to stay until Wednesday. Uncle went to the farm & I spent the day with Jessie McLaren & enjoyed it did a good days sewing Pa came over in the evening & had tea with us. When Jess came we had music & then a pineapple which made our tongues very sore we stayed up pretty late chatting oh it is nice to be happy & peaceful together

Tuesday 14
Up early by myself again today made scones & doughnuts & pancakes then went down to Binks & made a lot of doughnuts for them Went down to Nowra Kate Uncle Sam & I went to the Choral societies social enjoyed it fairly well Late getting home, that part not agreeing with me

Wednesday 15
Went down to Nowra to the meeting prayer for rain the church was full & it was a very nice profatable meeting It was grand to hear old hundred sung by so many voices it made me think of the thousands & thousands in Heaven all singing praise to God Grandfather came home with me

Thursday 16
Washing day I did some cleaning up & Mrs McPaul blackleaded the stove for me & helped to clean all the windows Had to go to Good Templars did not enjoy the meeting much Nellie stayed with us all night Uncle shot 4 pigeons

Friday 17
Busy cleaning up all the morning, ironed after dinner Auntie came up to tea then I went down with her & did some shopping & brought Jessie home It rained a little, & we were looking for it to rain more

Saturday 18
Great cleaning up this morning the place is all in good order wrote to Bert Uncle came home from Nowra & told me that Tom is home is'nt it splendid & he is coming to stay with us for a while (D.V.) God is so good to give us such happiness how can we ever do enough for Him, not while we are in the flesh, we are too sinful

Sunday 19
Up early no church all day Auntie came up & stayed all day had a very good time at S School, had a nice encouraging talk with Mr Gibson Tom Kate & Mother came up in the evening, then Kate went home & we all went to hear Mr Jackson I did enjoy the service Mr J stayed all night with us & we had a good long talk

Monday 20
No well all day languid & tired Mother went home Uncle went to the Valley for Mrs Nugent I read all the afternoon & Tom went over to the farm came home for tea had a nice little tea, such a treat to have Tom to do for, he is so easy to please, we had a nice chat, then we wrote to Effie for her birthday

Tuesday 21
Tom went out shooting got 4 pigeons Uncle brought Mrs Nugent over Jess & Uncle went to choral & we stayed up until they came home

Wednesday 22
Tom & Uncle went out shooting & Grandfather out for a walk After dinner Mrs Nugent & I went down to Nowra Kate & Mother came with us to the Church of England Harvest Festival Kate came home with me & Mrs Nugent stayed with Mother had a lovely drive home in the moonlight Jess Kate & I talked until all hours

Thursday 23
Tom & Uncle went to B Creek & from there to the Valley, intend going out shooting tomorrow Grandfather & I went over with Auntie for dinner Kate brought Mrs Nugent home & Auntie came up & had tea with us Jim Miles came home with Jessie we spent a pleasant evening

Friday 24
Grandfather Mrs Nugent & I went over & had dinner with Auntie then Mrs N & I went to Bices, quite an event for me have not been there for years, they were very kind we were both quite tired when we got home Its so dry I wonder when the rain will come, soon I hope. God will send it in His own good time, oh to wait patiently & bear His will patiently

Saturday 25
Usual Saturday work Mrs Nugent & Auntie Matthews went to Nowra Tom came home from the K Valley for dinner Uncle went out shooting & got 6 pigeons Mrs N came home in good time & after tea I went up to Aunties & Ma & baby were there

Sunday 26
Up in decent time stayed all day at Auntie Mr Dobbie preached in the morning Dr King at night did not enjoy the services much Sunday School very nice. Mr Gibson is so nice, he encourages me so

Monday 27
Busy all the morning preparing for Tuesday Mrs Nugent went home sorry she could not stay longer Went to Mr Burnets lecture did not care much for the lecture but like Mr Burnett very much 70 took the blue ribbon I hope great good will come out of his visit here Mr Jackson came home with us & we did not get to bed until 1 oclock

Tuesday 28
Very busy Baby McGregor christened today Mr Jackson & Mr Burnet All the McGregor but Aleck. Auntie Sam Mother Tom & Kate were all here & we spent a very pleasant time together Mr Burnett said he would remember this time Tom & I went to McLarens when Pa & Ma were going home Auntie got tea for Grandfather Altogether today has been a good day

Wednesday 29
Tom out shooting & Uncle away at the farm working Grandfather in bed not very well poor old man Kate came up after dark, was very glad to see her I was feeling lonely Tom did not come home stayed at the farm all night

Thursday 30
Grandfather Kate Tom Pa McGregor & I went up the Mt we had a very pleasant ramble got a lot of nice ferns & everlasting flowers Tom shot a cockatoo & three pigeons & a grey bird, it was his last days shooting in the Mt We all had a cup of tea at Baldys then turned our face homewards Not sorry to get home either Kate had to go straight home to Nowra

Friday 31
Up early & did a lot of work then Tom Grandfather & I went to Aunties for dinner, from there Tom & I went to Frasers & Kate F came home with us we spent a pleasant afternoon together Kate is very nice Its so nice to have Tom here Jessie gave us some music I could not as I have a bad cold

Saturday Sept 1st 1888
Usual Saturday work Tom went to have dinner with Jessie I went down after dinner & got the hymns for Sunday. Cold too bad to go out to practise Uncle at Nowra Auntie came up & had tea with us I had a cold & could not go out to practise

Sunday 2
Mr Par preached this morning Mr Jackson in the afternoon splendid sermon enjoyed it very much he came into the Sunday School & gave a little address Mr Jackson gave Uncle the text Tom is to prepare for his trial sermon

Monday 3
Up at six oclock started early for the farm Pa brought Grandfather in the buggy I helped Ma a little with her work had a good nurse baby was very good Ma Pa Maggie & Nellie came with us part of the way home When I came home found someone had been into the kitchen & stole more than half a currant cake I was very much annoyed as such a thing had never happened here since I came. I have not been very cheery today. I do want to be more thankful for the many priviledges we have when I see how Jessie's Mas has to work it make me feel that I should not murmur one bit

Tuesday 4
Made two aprons today practised too & felt lonely like a big goose tidied up my drawers & thought I would write to Harold Hunt Jess & Uncle away at choral Grandfather & I had a great talk about old things Uncle gave me 10/- to pay Mrs McPaul

Wednesday 5
Made two morning aprons today had quite a days sewing Jessie & I practised a little & Uncle did some transposing for Jess Went off to bed all in high spirits

Thursday 6
Finished two aprons for Jess & made a new one, did some mending, went for Jess had a meeting about the Good Templars to night arranged matters to our satisfaction Most peculiar night lightning & very like rain

Friday 7
Busy in the early morning Jessie McLaren came up in the morning & after dinner Mrs Brown & Mrs McDonald & baby came up great talking. Spent rather an enjoyable afternoon Auntie came up to tea all visitors went home after tea & Auntie & I went down with Jessie McLaren & then came home to take Jess home & found Tom there very glad to have him. Late going to bed

Saturday 8
Lazy after late hours but got through well with the work. Tom cut a lot of green backlogs & brought a barrow of wood for me. We will miss him when he goes for good Uncle & he have just gone to Nowra Kate came up & I went home with her

Sunday 9
Mother came home with me last night, a local preacher preached here Mother K Fraser & I went down to Nowra in the evening to hear Mr James enjoyed the service, Tom preached for Dr Grant

Monday 10
Worked about all the morning went out in the afternoon & got things to cook for the Good Templars tea Went to meet Jessie Uncle was at home to day working at his specimens of wood

Tuesday 11
Up early made puff paste tried to make it like Mrs Hollands & succeeded better than I expected made two seed cakes. Rained grandly nearly all day beautiful rain Undoubtedly an answer to the prayer of God's own people Minnie came up to stay all night I had a good practise & cut out a nightshirt

Wednesday 12
Uncle Kenny at home again today finished cutting all his specimens of wood I pottered about all day went to meet• Jess at night then we went & practised a little & of course went to bed Uncle tried to roast me away from the fire Uncle wrote to Katie Billis poor Katie Jessie death seems to have broken her heart Whatever makes me feel so lonely so often now I cannot surely be looking to Jesus as I might

Thursday 13
Up early made sponge rolls & scones for the Good Templars, Auntie came up to dinner I went to Frasers about quarter past four Matty Lang & Mr & Mrs J Monaghan were there Kate Fraser & I had to look after the laying of the table for the G. Templars tea, the table look grand Jessie made a lot of bunches of flowers giving the finishing touch About 37 came from Nowra & we spent a pleasant evening We were with Mr Bluett Walter Hodgkinson & J Miles nearly all the evening, everyone seemed happy & all passed off well

Friday 14
Billious the last day or two not lively this morning Went down to Jess after dinner & had herring & tatys Uncle & Jess off to the Choral concert at Nowra great fuss on Jess looked splendid at the concert I believe & sang well too, encored most of all

Saturday 15
Uncle Kennys birthday I killed a fowl & made a pie & custard & had Auntie William Bauerlin Mr & Mrs Binks to tea Mrs Binks brought Uncle a sponge cake & a nice piece of cheese I was sorry to go to practise & leave them

Sunday 16
Mr Par preached in the morning we all stayed at Aunties all day Mr Jackson preached at night & was splendid selfishness was the leading feature in the sermon Oh dear how selfish we are terribly selfish

Monday 17
Mr Jackson stayed with us last night Uncle had to go to work early & Mr Jackson & Grandfather & I had breakfast together & Mr J & I had a fine chat After I finished the work went to Nowra & took Jessie McLaren for a drive Mother bad with toothache Had a good nurse Baby & Ma still in Nowra

Tuesday 18
Went down to Binks early as Mrs Binks Is very bad with the cold (in bed) I did what I could for her but that was not much helped to make the bread etc Jane & May in bed with the measles such a house of invalids Went to Church at night Mr Dobbie preached very long as usual & was terribly sleepy Got on very well with the playing & singing

Wednesday 19
Auntie Grandfather & I went to Nowra had a very nice time & a big nurse Mother still bad with faceaches & quite weak miserable for her Kate was expecting Mrs Armstrong & Mrs Green to tea. Went to see Mrs Binks after I came home they came home & got tea went back to Binks again I rubbed her with hot oil Jess came & we poulticed her I do hope she will have a good night

Thursday 20
Cleaned up a little this morning, it has been raining beautifully nearly all day. Went down twice to see Mrs Binks I am so glad she is a little better poor body is suffering I do wish I could do something to ease her We leave her in Gods hands & He will heal her as He sees best Oh how good He is to us so unworthy as we are, Oh to serve Him better to live altogether for him

Friday 21
Very hot day Jess & I went to Nowra in the evening, it came on a very heavy storm rained heavily. Mr Aldcorn Dr & Mrs King were there, I dont care for Mrs King one bit, not our style at all we did not enjoy the evening much felt relieved to have it over Had a letter from Mary Matthews Harold Hunt & Jim McKenzie & a Centennial Album of Music from Bert Dick I think, very thoughtful of him

Saturday 22
Mother Jess & I came home from Nowra first thing this morning Auntie came up to tea came on a very heavy thunderstorm & I could not go to practise, went to bed early instead

Sunday 23
Was disappointed Mr Dobbie preached instead of Dr Grant Mr Gibson & I had a nice chat after we finished the Sunday School lessons I felt so discouraged to day dont seem to be doing any good Kate Fraser & Jessie came home with me, had tea & went to Mr Binks prayer meeting

Monday 24
Up early & cleaned up a lot of rubbish Mother helped me its so nice to have Mother here Auntie came up & had dinner with us then Auntie Jessie Jessie McLaren & I went to Frasers for tea, the Brennans & John McLaren came after tea & we spent a very pleasant musical evening Did not get home until late I had a nice chat to Joe Nugent

Tuesday 25
Up at the usual time 5 to 6. Spent a pleasant morning planted some flowers did some cooking was by myself for dinner. Mother had to go home hope she will come back again. Grandfather not very well, we think he has broken a rib, poor Mrs Binks is not very well again today. Wrote to thank Bert for the group

Wednesday 26
Nearly finished the second night shirt to day Went down to post a letter Auntie & William Bauerlin came up to tea

Thursday 27
Grandfather bad with the cold & his rib still paining him I drove Auntie down to Nowra when I knocked at the door was rather surprised to see Tom open it he looks very nice with his new teeth, looks younger Tom got a letter today asking him to go & fill the vacancy at Penrith, we were all sorry he had to go. Kate had the sewing people this afternoon Uncle at B Creek & was not home in time for me to go to Good Templars

Friday 28
Cleaned up in the morning took a run down to see Mrs Binks she is not well yet Made a flannel, went down to the Office to see Tom off by coach saw Tom off stayed a while with Jessie then came home & prepared tea Read Longfellow while waiting for Uncle to come Now quite well today Jess & I went to bed early

Saturday 29
Jessie & I up early Jessie helped me with the work whitewashed the fireplace for me feel rather lonely today dissatisfied, feel as tho I were making no progress in the Christian life Oh to live just for Christ, its hard to be good, the human nature in me is very very evil

Sunday 30
Mr Par preached in the morning no superintendent at Sunday School Jack Ison opened school & Mr Jackson was in time to close it, he spoke to the children of Timothy. As usual we all enjoyed his sermon very much the subject the Transfiguration. I have felt depressed the last while & fear I am not growing in Grace, but going back Oh it is hard to live aright

Monday Oct 1st 1888
I took Mother home to Nowra Uncle gave me three pounds one I have put away for Mrs McPaul. Kate & I went over to Grays & I brought Mrs Grey up to Jessie McLarens Uncle decided to go to the opening of the Kiama railway on Wednesday next, Finished my letter to Geo & am sending 1£ to them to get silk for me Had to pay the Bakers Bill 1£.10.7 ½ which took most of my money. bother Uncle

Tuesday 2
Did some cooking made scones like Miss Jacksons in the frying pan. Aleck McGregor Uncle Kenny & Auntie Matthews went to Nowra this evening so as to be ready for going to Kiama tomorrow, Jessie came home & we sat & talked & laughed for long enough Made a Chemise for myself Uncle Matthews & Mary came home from the Bellinger today

Wednesday 3
Georgies birthday, hope it will be a happy one, Opening of the Kiama Railway Kate & Bob went out of our family. The Governor (Lord Carrington) was there & he drove in Bob's coach from the train to Kiama Will McLean was driver & the Governor sat with him on the box seat & talked with him shook hand with him when going away & gave him half a sovereign. He is a grand Governor. My washing day, got Mrs McPaul to blacklead the stove I ironed some this evening I has been an awfully hot day. Made another Chemise today

Thursday 4
Up early & finished ironing before it got hot very boisterous day. Grandfather is not nearly well from the cold yet but his rib is better Went to the Silver Reading Jess & I did our share of singing were encored enjoyed the evening very well Mr Miles saw us home safely as usual Nearly twelve oclock when we got to bed

Friday 5
Did my Saturday cooking today & after dinner went down to see Mrs McLaren spent a few hours very pleasantly with her came home & got tea & wrote to Tom Jess did not come home so I went to bed early

Saturday 6
Usual work Mary Matthews came & had tea with us went to practise & had a meeting about starting a singing class decided to pay 1/- a quarter, Jessie did not go home

Sunday 7
Jess was here this morning after Church I went over to the farm with them Pa was sick all very glad to see me, Jess came home with me Uncle Sam back at S School today

Monday 8
Nice rain this morning did a lot of cooking Mother & Kate came up & I went to Nowra in Mothers place Bob was not home so Kate & I had it all to ourselves

Tuesday 9
Raining again today Kate & I stayed in all day Bob came home had a letter from Tom he does not seem to care much for Picton, they seem rather a careless people Uncle & Jessie did not come down tonight We intended going to Barr Hill but it rained

Wednesday 10
Cleared up today. Kate made a lot of sponge cakes for the School of Arts Bazaar after dinner we went to Mrs Kings & helped her to mark the prices on some of the things Then we got a buggy & went down to Terara to see Mrs Wells (Kate de Mestre) she looks so nice & was very nice. Came back & went to Matty Langs for tea & stayed until about nine oclock went home & to bed

Thursday 11
Up early went to the rocks & called to Emma Grey to ask her to come to Barr Hill with us Kate Emma & I started for B Hill at 9 oclock could not get the buggy into the place found everything very dilapidated not like old times change & decay on everything just the same as in us Went to Uncle Williams after got a lot of lemons Uncle was housekeeper, as the housekeeper was in Sydney, he made us a beautiful cup of tea poor old man he looks lonely Got home safely rather tired, letter from Belle

Friday 12
This is poor Mags birthday her second birthday in Heaven it is two years & four months since she left us. I wonder does she know the changes that have come since then there has been much sorrow, but God has been so good to us all Bob brought me home to Cambe this evening & Mother has gone home I have commenced reading Alec Forbes of Howglen by George McDonald

Saturday 13
Uncle & Grandfather went to B Creek & stayed all night Ma & Jess & Baby came & had dinner I went to see Jessie McLaren then Jessie & I stayed with Kate Fraser all night Emmie Hall & Mr Blackmoor came to Uncle Matthews

Sunday 14
I went to B Creek with Uncle & Auntie Sam it was Sacrament Sunday Mr Colly preached enjoyed the service oh what a priviledge to be allowed once more to sit at the Lord table Oh God is good. Very glad to see Bob Shepherd. & poor Uncle John & Auntie Mr Jackson & Colly stayed with us all night

Monday 15
Up at five oclock Mr Jackson & Colly Uncle Kenny Mary Matthews Emmie Hall & Kate Fraser & I went to the top of the Mt The three gentlemen getting specimens of flowers & wood. We had a very enjoyable day think more of Mr Jackson than ever dont care much for Mr Collie I fancy he is selfish Mr Jackson made us carry some of his specimens of wood teasing us a greater part of the time Met Kate Thorburn riding when we were coming home All had tea at Auntie but Mr J & Mr Collie

Tuesday 16
Very warm, tired after yesterday scramble took Grandfather to Auntie Sams in the evening. Mary & I went to the shop then to the singing class, got on very well for the first attempt, a good many out Mary came home with me & stayed all night

Wednesday 17
Up in decent time had a fine sleep, never woke all night made lemon syrup & did some cooking & a little sewing, had a practise & had a letter from Effie Leslie Grandfather not home Uncle went for Jess & I wrote to Jim McKenzie

Thursday 18
Uncle at home today did not do anything in particular

Friday 19
Did a lot of Saturday work today Grandfather bought some fish Jess & I the Brennans Frasers at Uncle Sam for tea spent rather a quiet evening

Saturday 20
Up early finished work early & Grandfather & I went to Nowra Grandfather stayed all night & Kate came home with me, did some shopping at Woolcotts. Went to practise as usual Aleck came home with me Aleck shaved & looks much better

Sunday 21
Dr Grant preached this morning I played Jess says it was much better Kate Uncle & I went to Uncle Sams for dinner after dinner Kate Mary & I went over to the farm then came back to church at night Had the boys in S School I feel that I am not fit to teach

Monday 22
Kate & I started out early & went to Minnie Millers Emma Hodgkinson & her little boy were there Emma looking well as usual It was lovely at Minnies everything looking so beautiful Went to Nowra after dinner & came home about 6 oclock Uncle in good humor Auntie came up & I went with her to singing practise, had a very good practise

Tuesday 23
Up at 5 oclock done working cooking and all about eight oclock covered the dining room stool Sat down to write letters Commenced a letter to Tom Mary Matthews came up & stayed all night

Wednesday 24
Finished work early & went over to Aunties with Mary for dinner then Mary came back with me & we went to Nowra Beatie Hayes & Mrs Scott spent the evening with us they are very nice Bob did not come in until late

Thursday 25
Kate Mary & I went to see the suspension bridge after breakfast then Kate came down to Nowra with us in the buggy came home found no one at home Went to Good Templars had a small meeting Commenced The Red Wallflower today

Friday 26
Up in decent time & made plum & seed cake to send to Mr Cosh for the Bazaar to be held in connection with his church I believe had a letter from Georgie & Tom Georgie sent me two stamps & Tom sent 2/6 worth quite a fortunate [sic] for me, very good of them Toms letter was very nice as usual Went to Brenans spent rather a pleasant evening did not get to bed until 1 oclock Mr Blackmore was there

Saturday 27
Up at half past five got the work done early & slept a bit finished The Red Wallflower” liked it very much Went to practise & learnt a new hymn
 
Sunday 28
Mr Par preached in the morning & Mr Jackson in the afternoon. I have to take the big girls in S School I am not fit to teach them Mr Jackson gave the children a short address on David they were awfully stupid & would not answer him

Monday 29
Raining Uncle stayed at home, I went over to Mary after dinner helped her to hang some pictures, got some tomato plants Went to Singing Class in the evening very fair attendance & had a fairly good practise

Tuesday 30
Washing day busy all day Minnie came & stayed all night as it was raining Jess came home in spite of the rain Had a nice letter from Katie Billis also five rules for young Christians very good. Uncle is in high spirits

Wednesday 31
Up in fair time raining Uncle stayed at home. I did cooking, made a Yorkshire pudding which was very nice for the first attempt Made a flannel for myself did a little gardening Grandfather seems lonely now that Auntie is away, he has no one to read for him Felt so lonely today ready to look rather on the black side. I do long to be better & I am trying to do something for Jesus everyday. He is so good

Thursday Nov 1st 1888
Went to do the quarterly shopping then went to Nowra with Mary Matthews Had a pleasant drive

Friday 2
Grandfather walked to Pyree & I went over to the Farm & stayed all day with Ma. Pa & Uncle went to Nowra Jess & I came home together

Saturday 3
After finishing work went up to Binks farm with Mrs Binks Tired after the long walk, went to Practise as usual

Sunday 4
No preaching until night I was too sick to go out Kate Fraser came up from S School & stayed for tea I had to stay at home alone

Monday 5
Went over to Mas this morning Ma & I set to work to make Jessies white dress William Bauerlin & Mr McKay came over after dinner• & stayed to tea I dont feel well at all sorry because I went to do a lot for Ma

Tuesday 6
Uncle went to B Creek to Presbytery meeting Nellie stayed at Uncle Matthews Dubs Jess & Min went to Nowra so Pa Ma Baby & I had a quiet evening to ourselves

Wednesday 7
I cooked for Ma for the School Picnic Jessie came home in the evening nothing strange happened

Thursday 8
Came home from the farm this morning just 12 months today since dear little Teecie died & two years since Grannie died I do not like to think of dear Teecie it makes me wish to have him & he is better with Jesus than with us poor Belle will feel it today I went to Nowra & stayed all night & Mother came home in my place

Friday 9
Tom Kate & I came up from Nowra Mr Blackmore also came all went to the School picnic & enjoyed ourselves better than we expected all went to Aunties for tea & spent the evening Emmie Hall was there

Saturday 10
Up in good time got the work done early

Sunday 11
Mr Par preached in the morning I did not teach in School as my throat was very sore had to play at night for Mr Jennings as my throat was too sore to sing Liked Mr J very much Tom & he stayed with us all night It will make me more thankful for my voice when it is well, it is a great priviledge to be able to sing

Monday 12
Mr Jenning Tom & I had a late breakfast About 11 oclock Mr Jennings & Tom went to Fraser then to Aunties for dinner. I drove to Jessie McLarens & in the evening Jessie McL & I took Tom to the bridge

Tuesday 13
Had to go & make the children practise their hymns for Monday night Mary M came up had tea & went to Nowra with Uncle & Jess Grandfather & I went to church Mr Glasson preached I had to play & sing the first hymn as nobody was there to play. Tom got word to go to Walcha I wont see him

Wednesday 14
Very windy & hot stayed home all day darning & mending. Mary Matthews stayed with me until 3 oclock, had great fun all to ourselves Mary tumbled over in the rocking chair I went for Jessie, dreadful fires all about several persons burnt out, how thankful we should be that we are spared while others are having such losses

Thursday 15
Hot & windy stayed at home and sewed all day went for Jess at night Nice cool evening southerly wind lovely after the heat. Horrid pen

Friday 16
Lovely cool morning Jess & I up in good time & had a good practise. I made a plum cake for the Sunday School tea

Saturday 17
Uncle rode up to see Mr & Mrs Watts Jessie did not go home After practise we came home & talked until all hours I wrote to Virgie & Effie

Sunday 18
Mr Dobbie preached & were all tired of him Sunday School rather short had to arrange for the tea Jess came home with me & we went to bed at eight oclock This has seemed a strange day Uncle away & Jessie here

Monday 19
Up at five oclock did some more cooking for the tea After dinner went down to prepare the church etc. Mr Jackson & Mr Dobbie came & we had quite a large gathering Mr Blackmore turned up. Spent a very pleasant evening Mr Jackson presented Robert Shepherd with the books from the teacher & scholars All was over before ten oclock There has not been one hitch this we owe to the One who does all things well

Tuesday 20
Rather sleepy this morning Uncle in high humour

Wednesday 21
Washing day, big washing Mrs McPaul cleaned the stove & fireplace

Thursday 22
Ironed half the day very hot Concert at Nowra Kate & Jessie singing Went to Good Templars

Friday 23
Banquet at Nowra for Sir Henry Parkes great gathering Kate Mary & I went to the Banquet lot of ladies present we were introduced to Sir Henry Bob brought him down from Kiama. Sir Henry proposed "The Ladies" He is a fine looking man but not lovesome

Saturday 24
Very hot 104 in the shade had a good sleep after last nights dissapation Mother came over

Sunday 25
Mr Par preached this morning Mr Jackson in the afternoon, but I was out keeping Baby for Ma. Ma Pa Nell Baby came up to tea, Letter from Jim McKenzie

Monday 26
News from N/Bay that Belle & Geo are coming home disgusted with Tom Stafford poor little Brucie it will be hard to leave him behind poor Geo it will come very hard on her Oh how things change & how soon people seem to forget may God keep me from such a thing

Tuesday 27
Up early Uncle packing to go to Melbourne I went to Nowra with Uncle Mary & I went to the Choral Concert & enjoyed it fairly well

Wednesday 28
Uncle left for Melbourne this morning. Mother stayed with Grandfather & I stayed with Kate. Auntie & Uncle came & took Mary home

Thursday 29
Rained to day Kate worked at my white dress stayed inside all day

Friday 30
Did not do anything in particular

Saturday Dec 1st 1888
After work & dinner was over Kate & I came up & had tea with Mother Jess came up from the Office with us & then went as far as McLarens with us & waved us out of sight & then trotted off to the farm

Sunday 2
Went to Church in Nowra After dinner Kate & I went for a walk & after tea Kate & I & Mr Blackmore went to hear Mr Best preach

Monday 3
Prepared for going to Gerringong

Tuesday 4
Went by coach to Gerringong Bella Boxsel & her baby were on the coach & we had a good chat Annie Miller met me at their gate & gave me a warm reception making me feel at home. Did great talking about Bert & Mr Barnet In the evening Doll & Dave Richardson Mr & Mrs Sefton Mr Woods & Miss Hindmarsh & Miss Potter came & we spent rather a pleasant evening the Millers are so kind

Wednesday 5
Annie Miller went to Kiama in the evening Alice & I stayed at home & talked until all hours. I think Alice is a very sensible girl Annie came home about 12 oclock

Thursday 6
A Miss Sanders came up in the afternoon & Annie Alice Miss Sanders & I went down to "Weary Creek” had great fun talking about “The Boys” had tea there & a good roam round came home had another tea & went to bed early

Friday 7
I started out to Halls & met them on their way to "Weary Creek" made me go with them then Dick & Fred Hall brought me back to their place saw the "Albums" & at 3 oclock Mr Miller came & took me into Kiama we enjoyed the drive I went to Finlaysons Martha was at home then after tea Mrs W Finlayson took me to Westons then to her place & Gerty Green & Miss Weston took me back to Finlaysons

Saturday 8
Very warm morning started for Sydney by the afternoon train & enjoyed the trip very much the scenery was lovely. Met Deb Richardson After we left the National Park a young gentleman got in & he commenced talking & I found he had been at Nowra so we chatted away & the time passed quickly he was very Kind to me Belle & Geo met me at the Station & we went straight home

Sunday 9
Tom Belle Geo Bruce & I went out to see Belle Boxsell enjoyed ourselves, then came in to hear Dr Jeffreys

Monday 10
Went out shopping I believe

Tuesday 11
Forgotten what we did over in town

Wednesday 12
Over in town again

Thursday 13
Over to town once more

Friday 14
Town again did a lot of shopping. Belle turned her brown skirt & I was the dummy

Saturday 15
Geo left for home Belle & I went to the garden & met Bert there, Bert looked very thin & pale, had a chat to him, then he had to go home to Windsor. Came home had tea & Tom made us go back to town with him. Then came home by the Mt Syd Skipper & Aleck Graham came with us, we had lots of fruit & music did not get to bed until 12

Sunday 16
Raining but Syd Aleck Tom & I went to Church to North Ashe [sic] Just went thro the lessons & sent us off home. After dinner sang hymns & went out for a walk 
enjoyed it very much & liked Aleck & Syd very much indeed

Monday 17
Aleck & Syd had to leave early to go to work. We enjoyed their visit very much indeed sorry they had to go so soon. Belle started her zepher dress & I did the work got on very well with the skirt

Tuesday 18
Did some packing up & got the washing ready

Wednesday 19
Got up early & washed went out shopping before dinner came on a heavy storm could not go anywhere had to come home folded the clothes & went to bed

Thursday 20
I ironed while Belle work at the body of her dress & we worked away all day. Tom took us to Harry Nobles concert in the Y M C A Hall & we enjoyed it very much very pleased with [UNCLEAR] Allpress. Packed up all the things

Friday 21
Tom had today a holiday, he went over to town with us we did our shopping came home & got everything into order for tomorrow Mr Barnet & Bert Dick went to Nowra today

Saturday 22
Up early & left N Bay [Neutral] for home (for good) Got the 9.30 train. Jean Finlayson came with us had a lovely trip to Kiama then the coach was packed & we did not get to Nowra until after dark. Bob met us there & when we got half way home Bert & Mr Barnet met us. After tea we had some music & went to bed not sorry to be home

Sunday 23
Bert Donald Tom S Kate Bob & I went to church Dr Grant preached After dinner sang some hymns then Bert Kate Donald Belle Bruce & I went for a walk over to the Rocks. Bert & I & Donald & Kate went down the rock then Kate went home & we three came home together Jess Geo & Pa Dub were there. Bert Donald Belle & I went to Church Mr Dobbie preached & was not so bad

Monday 24
Did all kinds of things cooking etc the boys helped a bit after tea Kate & Bert & Donald & I went down to Nowra & had a look round we missed Kate & Bert & came home without them sat on the verandah & had a chat Bert & Kate turned up all right

Tuesday 25
Christmas morning merry Christmas to all. Tom S. Bert Belle Donald Bruce Kate & I left Nowra for Bangley Creek where we met Jess & all the McGregors & Matthews Belle gave Bert & Donald silk hankys & we slipped them into their pockets without their knowing they were very pleased we spent rather a pleasant day together then Jess came home in the coach with us & we had rather a noisy lot Cleaned ourselves & had music for the rest of the evening Jessie heard that naughty song of Donalds "Clickety Clack"

Wednesday 26
Jess stayed all day. Bert was very queer with me nearly all day but made it up in the evening Orrible ot day Bert & Don went to a cricket match then after tea Don & Jess & Bert & I went round the show ground for a walk Bert & I sat down & had a nice talk while Jess & Don walked round & round & talked & talked Then came home & played Dominoes Bell Jess & Don against Bert Kate & me Then we had more music & went to bed very late

Thursday 27
Jess & I had to come home The boys got up & said goodbye to us Bert hid my basket Tom S. drove us home I brought Mrs McPaul up & we set to work & had a great cleaning up the place was awfully dirty Mother Geo & Bruce were here Tom S layed the oilcloth in the dining room for me. Tired after all the work

Friday 28
Up in good time I believe & did a lot of cooking & ironing & prepared for the boys to come up but Mr Blackmore forgot to give them the letter so they could not come & we were disappointed but they sent word that they would be up in the morning

Saturday 29
Trotted round & the boys Bert & Don & (Tom S) came for dinner I felt shy but very glad to see them. Donald went out shooting. Tom S took Bruce & Grandfather to Nowra We spent a very pleasant evening together plenty of music

Sunday 30
No church until afternoon sang hymns in the morning & Don & I went to Sunday School Don took my class. Bert & Jess washed up & came to Church after 
After church the four of us went to Binks came home had tea & went to Binks again to get something for Geo she was bad with the cold Bert gave me great instructions what to give her. Jess & Don had a long talk on the verandah

Monday 31
Dubbs was to come up early & go out with Donald shooting he did not come I did some cooking early & at 11 Bert said he would go out with Donald so I got them a cup of tea & something to eat which they enjoyed very much Bert especially said it was better than all the dinners They started off & Geo & I got all the work done & tried to have a sleep about 5 the boys came home pretty tired & very hot we had great fun Then Bert saw 2 parrots in a tree & he must send Don off to shoot them Bert was bent on mischief they flew away just as Donald got there & that set us off laughing afresh Then they went for a bath & we had tea & more music & talking. We sat up until 12 oclock to see the old year out & the new in Bert was very gracious & nice Jess & Donald entertained us with plenty of music At 12 we all wished each other a happy New Year & went off to bed I hope with the determination to live better in the coming year

 

View the diary entries by year:

1888 1889
1890 1891
1892 1893
1895 1896

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